tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-983127264833046192024-03-14T03:04:51.566-05:00Life Out of the BoatADVENTURES IN MARRIAGE, MOTHERHOOD, AND MINISTRYAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.comBlogger40125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-25721291682190501662016-12-20T22:25:00.004-06:002016-12-20T22:25:48.524-06:00A Year Later<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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p a x</div>
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December 15th marked <a data-mce-href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.com/this-is-not-the-cross-i-wanted/" href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.com/this-is-not-the-cross-i-wanted/" style="word-wrap: break-word;"> one year since the miscarriage </a> of our son, David. Throughout the day I struggled to pin point exactly <strong style="word-wrap: break-word;">what</strong> and <strong style="word-wrap: break-word;">how</strong> I was feeling.</div>
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There is a sadness there, of course. The details of that day are still a vivid memory for me, some parts of it being more painful than others. </div>
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There is a sadness, and yet there is so much joy in our home right now. Simon is our "rainbow baby". And while I'm not crazy about the term, I do acknowledge that there is something very special about the baby you have after experiencing a loss. I keep thinking that Simon wouldn't be here if we had not lost David... and I'm so grateful for this beautiful baby boy. However, I still miss the baby I never met, the child I never got to hold. </div>
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So on December 15th of this year there was an ache, a sadness, but also gratitude for the healing that has taken place in my heart since then, and for the gift of my son, Simon, who I believe was given to us for a very important reason. </div>
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Over the past year, I've met so many women who have experienced child loss of some kind. I've been connected to women who had miscarriages similar to mine, women who lost their babies even later in the pregnancy, and women who have had multiple losses. This is not a cross any of us would have chosen for ourselves, and I think we all recognize how a loss like this <em style="word-wrap: break-word;">changes</em> you forever. Everyone's experience is different, everyone's journey towards healing is different... but we share that same ache and longing. </div>
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A year ago I was hurting physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I was grieving. At times I was so angry at God that I couldn't participate in Mass without crying. I think part of me was also afraid of what this meant for our family's future. </div>
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A year later, the ache is still there. But the pain is soothed by the joy and blessing of our son. In no way is Simon a <a data-mce-href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.com/dear-little-saint-i-havent-forgotten-you/" href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.com/dear-little-saint-i-havent-forgotten-you/" style="word-wrap: break-word;"> "replacement" or a reason to forget the baby we lost </a>. I think Simon is a reminder that God hears the ache of our hearts and He answers in His own perfect timing <a data-mce-href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.com/god-hears-god-answers-simon-nathaniel/" href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.com/god-hears-god-answers-simon-nathaniel/" style="word-wrap: break-word;"> (which makes Simon's name extra meaningful!) </a>.</div>
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I know there are many families right now for whom the pain is still very raw. There are couples still waiting for their rainbow, and others who are struggling to find peace within the ache. Our journeys, our stories may be very different. But please know that I am thinking of you and praying for you, especially during this Advent and Christmas season. </div>
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God hears and God answers. And His timing is always perfect.</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-23929452698379804692016-11-16T17:00:00.001-06:002016-11-16T17:00:54.490-06:00God Hears & God Answers: Simon Nathanielp a x<br />
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He's here! He's finally here!</div>
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There's so much to say about the days and hours leading up to my son's arrival (and a birth story is in the works). But the one thing that keeps coming to mind every time I cradle him in my arms, nuzzle him close to my chest, or smell that intoxicating newborn scent is <b><i>I'm so glad that you are here.</i> </b><br />
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I still remember, quite vividly, the night <a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2016/04/saints-surprises-surrender.html" target="_blank">I found out I was pregnant</a>. I stood in the bathroom waiting for the flashing dots on the digital tests to reveal our fate. I was having an internal conversation, my mind swirling with all the reasons why there was no way it could be positive, but everything came to a screeching halt when I looked down and read the word "Pregnant" on the screen.</div>
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I gasped. I think I may have even said the words "Oh no" out loud. </div>
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Unlike my previous 2 pregnancies this was not a moment filled with joy and excitement. I burst into tears. <span style="text-align: center;">I was scared. </span>It had barely been two full months since the <a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2016/01/this-is-not-cross-i-wanted.html" target="_blank">miscarriage</a> and I was pregnant again.</div>
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<i>How could I do this?</i></div>
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<i> Why would God let this happen? </i></div>
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<i>The doctor told us to wait 3 months before trying to get pregnant again... </i></div>
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<i>...did I put this child in danger because I didn't chart correctly? </i></div>
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<i>Am I going to lose this baby too?</i></div>
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<i>I'm not ready...</i></div>
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<i>What if...</i><br />
<i></i>[insert a million different worries here]<i> </i></div>
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I walked out of the bathroom and into my husband's arms. His reaction was perfect. <br />
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"This child is a gift. It's going to be OK."</div>
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It took me weeks to really accept the news. I didn't want to get too attached or too excited. I had to protect my heart from being hurt again... Yet in those weeks of waiting to hear my son's heartbeat for the first time, God was working on <i>my </i>heart. <br />
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He reminded me that <b>this child deserved to be loved from the very beginning</b>, just as I had opened my heart to love Alexandria & the child that we lost. God was asking me to trust Him, to surrender all of the fear and worry over to Him. </div>
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It was a slow process, and one I struggled with even up to the moment my son was born, but this pregnancy was an exercise in surrendering my anxious heart to Christ. </div>
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Now, as I hold my son against my heart, I can't imagine life without him. Where there was once fear and worry, all I can think about now is how grateful I am that he is here. <br />
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I will never know why we lost our baby last December. I will never understand why that had to happen. But as I hold my beautiful baby boy I realize that I wouldn't have him if we hadn't suffered that loss first. God said "let there be life" and here he is! <br />
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<b>How We Chose His Name</b></h2>
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With all of our pregnancies so far we've been "Team Green", meaning we don't find out the baby's sex before he or she is born. We try to come up with our top 2 boy and top 2 girl names and then wait and see which one fits the baby best. </div>
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Getting <i>any </i>name on the list seemed more challenging this time around, but when we settled on the names they just felt right. </div>
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Nathaniel is one of the names that we had on the boy list for our firstborn. For me, the meaning of the name is what kept drawing me to it. <b>God has answered. </b>'Nuff said. </div>
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The name Simon, on the other hand, sort of took me by surprise. My brother-in-law, Matthew, was visiting us in August and one night we were going through a name book that had some of the most ridiculous sounding names in it. We were laughing at the thought of naming our child something strange like "Queezimus" and then Matthew started going through the S names and said "Simon". "Actually that's not a bad name," he said before moving on down the list. Something about that name caught my attention, so I googled the meaning:<br />
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<b>Simon: Hebrew origin. God has heard</b>. </h2>
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<i><b>Simon Nathaniel. </b></i><i><b>God has heard & God has answered.</b> </i>That's the name. My husband agreed, and it was the only boy name we put on our list. About a week later I went to daily Mass on the feast of St. Bartholomew (whom I learned also goes by Nathaniel), so that was enough confirmation for me that we'd chosen the right boy name. </div>
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What I didn't know at the time was that the feast of St. Simon and St. Jude was October 28th, a week after my due date. Simon Nathaniel Johnston arrived on Friday, October 28th at 1:12am. </div>
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Well played, Holy Spirit :)<br />
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I'm grateful for the many prayers for me and Simon during my pregnancy and all of the prayers that covered us during the 12 hours of labor. I'll share Simon's birth story later this week, but I gotta say God's hand was definitely all over the labor and delivery process!<br />
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St. Simon and St. Jude, pray for us!<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-87992464370885255472016-10-21T16:03:00.000-05:002016-10-21T16:03:14.280-05:00Dear Little Saint, I Haven't Forgotten Youp a x<br />
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<i>October is Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month. <a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2016/01/this-is-not-cross-i-wanted.html" target="_blank">I miscarried at 7 weeks on December 15</a>, 2015. I'm due with our "Rainbow Baby" any day now, but I wanted to make sure I had a chance to get these words in writing before he or she arrives. </i><br />
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Dear Little Saint,<br />
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I want you to know that I haven't forgotten you. August 5th, your due date, sort of came and went without us doing anything substantial, but I was thinking about you then just as I am now. </div>
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You'd be going on three months old at this point... Instead we are waiting for your little brother or sister to be born any day now. As excited as I am to meet the new baby, there's still a part of me that knows that <i>you</i> should be here too. </div>
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I know I never got to hold you or snuggle you. We lost you only a few weeks after discovering that you existed, and the ache is still very much present. You are <i>you</i>. A unique creation, made from love whom I never got to meet, but a real person with an eternal soul, You were there, and then you were gone. This pregnancy has definitely helped me to heal, but in no way can this baby ever replace you.<br />
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Little Saint, I haven't forgotten you. Every morning on our drive to daycare your big sister and I say our morning prayers and always ask for the intercession of Our Lady and you, our Little Saint, in the intentions of the day. What a blessing it is to know that you and Mama Mary are taking our prayers and petitions to Jesus for us daily! Thank you for those prayers. You know how much we need them!</div>
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Before your little brother or sister is born, your Dad and I knew that it was important that you, our Little Saint, had a name. It's a name that's been on my heart since that cold night in December when I took my grief to the adoration chapel and God whispered your name. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgK87ATM_s3I7L5KV3GZmsaYvivruxBQbCIB6nTqJmiJ0Kngbx4_rm6iIbK62TEV9kuLWXUFA4_fcDprxLNTm7m6UeOA7VhbwLth1IvrVW_x5x5MmCA7oEnYY9G2u-hXKkD621IS6ZcpfA/s1600/David+Johnston-smaller.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgK87ATM_s3I7L5KV3GZmsaYvivruxBQbCIB6nTqJmiJ0Kngbx4_rm6iIbK62TEV9kuLWXUFA4_fcDprxLNTm7m6UeOA7VhbwLth1IvrVW_x5x5MmCA7oEnYY9G2u-hXKkD621IS6ZcpfA/s320/David+Johnston-smaller.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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And so, little David, my Little Saint, please know that I haven't forgotten you and that I love you. I know that we'll meet each other some day, and that brings me so much joy and peace. <br />
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Please keep praying for us! We love you forever. </div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-21131653085654697842016-06-05T16:17:00.000-05:002016-06-05T16:17:09.403-05:0020 weeks along & 16 months old<div style="text-align: justify;">
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Somehow I blinked and I'm 20 weeks pregnant. <i>Twenty weeks! </i>That's pretty much the halfway point. How did so much time pass without me really noticing?</div>
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When I was pregnant with Alexandria I remember feeling like it took forever to get to 20 weeks. I would check my "What to Expect" app every Wednesday morning to find out the size of the baby and to watch that very perky lady give me two minutes of insight into utero. </div>
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While I do check the app from time to time to make sure I've got the right week in my mind and to know what food best represents the baby's size at this point, this time is different. It's not that I'm ignoring this little one inside of me, I think time just feels different because I have an almost 16 month old who is growing up fast and changing everyday!<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgew99SCBH3p_CPMIt5yVc6Jmg6bnPpfYgqGClB6taHmincfy9MI8bYhcvxejZtAHHEDqAMYd5GkGNKtl5fLASXTrvVgvHZC0yqpn-16We4SFmsdIYVoaW4w9CsAN-L0c5Xt87pyIu8F4k/s1600/Bubbles+before+Bedtime.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgew99SCBH3p_CPMIt5yVc6Jmg6bnPpfYgqGClB6taHmincfy9MI8bYhcvxejZtAHHEDqAMYd5GkGNKtl5fLASXTrvVgvHZC0yqpn-16We4SFmsdIYVoaW4w9CsAN-L0c5Xt87pyIu8F4k/s320/Bubbles+before+Bedtime.png" width="275" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Bubbles before Bedtime</td></tr>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHQHsBvqm7bm6ZdUSP_YRHEapksDcT-jJ15-8Sez-Xj0WWiPt2bgQatSzMNgUnZ_qS4TL5k4cceMOA0Y5NYSHFsAr19tKsrwNcJ_l_ggxil8qx0xG6ujRoDWFdP_wt31dqlW3kvdkjtKk/s1600/2016-05+baby+pool.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHQHsBvqm7bm6ZdUSP_YRHEapksDcT-jJ15-8Sez-Xj0WWiPt2bgQatSzMNgUnZ_qS4TL5k4cceMOA0Y5NYSHFsAr19tKsrwNcJ_l_ggxil8qx0xG6ujRoDWFdP_wt31dqlW3kvdkjtKk/s320/2016-05+baby+pool.png" width="246" /></a>Somehow we blinked and our daughter went from an army crawling baby to a toddler whose vocabulary and personality have just exploded over the past couple of months. It's like she's not just a baby any more, she's a little <i>person</i> with likes and dislikes, favorite books and toys, and is very excited about exploring the world around her.</div>
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I haven't written down all of the words that she can say yet, but I'm pretty sure we're well over 30 words at this point. She has started telling us what she wants to do, putting together simple sentences like "This is a book." or "This is a ball". Sometimes she just gets straight to the point with an enthusiastic "ELMO!!"<br />
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And boy is she full of personality! She loves playing outside, especially in her new baby pool, and I've never seen a toddler so engrossed in books before. She has two babies that she takes care of, and I'm pretty sure she's already got the big sister thing down pat. She also gives the best hugs in the world, which melts my heart every.single.time.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjACm5QmV3PTmTLge8J9swmFQd3mKDlQqWy6NmIPIT6MxOFPtiUGiWHQuetxLx4oVdoJ-5lWGITW-jbVIbe0zcZvNQseWPM-QXQ0S1WrBmh6Uam0RtwDTLvW5C7jZa5Bl13ADh3SqsBBiE/s1600/Mother+Daughter+Moment1.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjACm5QmV3PTmTLge8J9swmFQd3mKDlQqWy6NmIPIT6MxOFPtiUGiWHQuetxLx4oVdoJ-5lWGITW-jbVIbe0zcZvNQseWPM-QXQ0S1WrBmh6Uam0RtwDTLvW5C7jZa5Bl13ADh3SqsBBiE/s200/Mother+Daughter+Moment1.png" width="200" /></a>Two years ago I took a pregnancy test during my lunch break. My husband waited with me in the bathroom, and when we saw that big fat positive on the stick, there's no way that I could have imagined what life would be like a year or two from that moment. </div>
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One year ago when Alexandria was just 4 months old, I had no idea what sort of adventures we would be in for as she grew into a toddler. And now as I watch her learn and grow I realize that there's even <b>more excitement</b>, even <b>more love</b>, even<b> more wonder and awe</b> ahead of us. <br />
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God willing, this time next year we'll have a 2 year old and a 7 month old in the house. At this point my mind cannot compute that information right now and I'm not even going to try to imagine what life will look like in the Johnston Headquarters.</div>
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But I do know that it's going to be beautiful and wonderful. There will be overwhelming days, and there will be peaceful moments. There will be chaos and plenty of imperfection, but I'm confident that there will also be a lot of joy, laughter, and love.<br />
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Thank you Lord for the gift of this vocation!</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-64397955379853149062016-04-27T20:14:00.001-05:002016-04-27T20:14:07.953-05:00Saints, Surprises, & Surrenderp a x<br />
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Every morning on our drive to daycare Alexandria (1yr), and I say morning prayers. Usually it's just simple things like thanking God for another day, asking that God keep us safe and bring us back together at the end of the day, and for any special intentions I can remember at 8am. We always close by saying "We ask these things through the intercession of Our Lady and our <a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2016/01/this-is-not-cross-i-wanted.html" target="_blank">Little Saint</a>..." followed by 3 Hail Mary's, a Glory Be and then a litany of our family's patron saints:</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzCB3eBJ0kSIGEScS7_r140149t2nsQAiug6ycGtYxOaVtratxOCNUoXlyeDNymzDfaeN1DGOAbHMiNQ3NaQuAgfgPyh_-kDbEWI5uS7H4xgFDHgw6UwjSs0qh92rAzZcS4f4VepYlZAU/s1600/PicMonkey+Collage-pray+for+us.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzCB3eBJ0kSIGEScS7_r140149t2nsQAiug6ycGtYxOaVtratxOCNUoXlyeDNymzDfaeN1DGOAbHMiNQ3NaQuAgfgPyh_-kDbEWI5uS7H4xgFDHgw6UwjSs0qh92rAzZcS4f4VepYlZAU/s400/PicMonkey+Collage-pray+for+us.png" width="367" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">We plan on making a patron saint wall in our house and ordering these icons from MonasteryIcons.com</td></tr>
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<b>St. Thomas Aquinas</b> (my husband's confirmation saint), <b>St. Faustina</b> (my confirmation saint), <b>St. Scholastica</b> (Alexandria's birthday saint) & <b>St. Catherine of Siena</b> (patroness of miscarriages). </div>
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We go through this litany every morning, and I've really enjoyed starting this tradition with my daughter. She will even throw in an "A-Muh!" (amen) at the end for us.</div>
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Around the first week of February we were going through our traditional litany when I heard myself say, "<b>St. John Paul II,</b> pray for us.. <b>St. Kateri Tekawitha</b>, pray for us." And then I said out loud, "Huh. Where did <i>they </i>come from?" Sure, JPII is a family favorite. I'm a Theology of the Body junkie after all, so adding him to the list seemed appropriate. But <i><a href="https://www.ewtn.com/saintsHoly/saints/K/blkateritekakwitha.asp">St. Kateri Tekawitha</a>? </i>I didn't know anything about her except that she's the first Native American Saint and that her feast day is some time in July. Why on earth would she come to mind?</div>
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I sort of shrugged it off , but we kept them in the litany from that point on. Little did I know, this wasn't some kind of fluke. St. Kateri and John Paul II knew something that I didn't. </div>
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Fast forward to February 18th...</div>
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I took a pregnancy test. It was positive. </div>
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<b>I'm due on October 21,</b> t<b>he day St. Kateri was canonized a saint. </b></div>
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<b>October 22 is St. John Paul II's feast day.</b> </div>
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Well played, Holy Spirit.</div>
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This pregnancy is different from the other two. For one, this is the first time we are really and truly <i>surprised</i> that we are pregnant. We had very much been planning to wait the doctor's recommended 3 months after the miscarriage before trying again, if not longer. So when I read the word "Pregnant" on the test, my first reaction was <b>fear </b>and <b>worry</b>... <i>what if I had put this baby in danger by simply not waiting the amount of time my doctor had suggested</i>? Thankfully, my husband was incredibly encouraging (and continues to be) and reminded me that no matter what <b>this child is a gift. </b><br />
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Any woman who experienced a loss of any kind will tell you that the next pregnancy is just <b>different</b>. I hesitated to accept the news, I struggled to open my heart to the excitement and joy out of fear that it would be stripped away. Lent was a journey of healing, rediscovering joy, and realizing that <b>this child deserves to know that he or she was loved from the <i>moment of conception</i>.</b> Fear can't get in the way of opening my heart.<br />
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This Friday I will be 15 weeks pregnant. There has been plenty of morning sickness, nausea, and heartburn... which I'm grateful for, because it means things are moving along. Yesterday I had the joy of hearing this little one's heartbeat for the first time, which gave me a renewed sense of peace. While I'm not sure the anxiety or questions of "<i>what if</i>?" will ever go away completely, I do feel like I'm able to surrender my worries into God's hands. <br />
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I think one of the greatest comforts of this pregnancy so far has been knowing that we have a Little Saint in heaven praying for his younger brother/sister, and the intercession of St. Kateri and St. John Paul II. No matter what happens, God knew I needed prayers even before I knew I was pregnant, and that gives me hope!<br />
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For those struggling with infertility, hurting from miscarriages and the loss of children, and those who are longing for a child of your own... Please know that you and your intentions have been close to my heart, and I will continue to pray for you throughout this pregnancy and beyond. <br />
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For all of you who have been praying for our family since we lost our baby in December, I cannot express adequately how meaningful your prayers are to me. Your prayers, encouragement, and this baby have helped joy return to my heart.<br />
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be at peace<br />walk on water<br />be not afraid<br /><br />d*</h2>
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Jesus I Trust in You!</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-31440738588901576522016-02-16T16:00:00.000-06:002016-02-16T18:17:22.570-06:00On Not Finishing Everything Before *30*<div style="text-align: justify;">
p a x<br />
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Two weeks ago I turned 30 years old.</div>
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That's right. The big 3-0. No longer a twenty-something...just thirty. Gasp! </div>
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Surprisingly, I'm OK. I survived the transition. The clump of gray hairs on the top of my head seems a little more shiny than usual, but other than that I'm OK.</div>
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As my birthday came closer, people asked the same typical question, "So...how are you feeling about turning THIRTY?" I responded with the typical "Eh..." I mean sure, saying the word "<i>thur-tee" </i>leaves a slightly sour taste in my mouth, but I think that's mostly because 30 used to seem so far away. And now here it is... with no where for me to run.<br />
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Yet there was also a very satisfying feeling about jumping into this new decade. It wasn't like I lived under a rock for the last ten years. A lot of life happened in the past decade. <b><a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2015/07/what-god-can-do-in-decade.html">A lot of GOD happened in the past decade</a>. </b></div>
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Some time after I had turned 20 I made the obligatory "Before I'm 30" list. I decided to go looking for it in my box of journals because I know that there are things that I can definitely mark off the list, such as: </div>
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<li style="text-align: justify;">Travel to a Spanish speaking country (Studied in Costa Rica 2007 & lived in Mexico for a year)</li>
<li style="text-align: justify;">Help someone become Catholic (RCIA sponsor in 2012)</li>
<li style="text-align: justify;">Discern my vocation (Got married 10/5/2013)</li>
<li style="text-align: justify;">Travel to Rome & have an audience with the Pope (<a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2013/11/a-few-moments-with-francis.html">Best. Honeymoon. Ever</a>.)</li>
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There were others on there that I know I didn't complete such as <i>Publish a book</i>, but I did write an 85 page thesis for my MA Theology degree in 2014, so maybe that can count? :) </div>
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It isn't uncommon for people to have a Bucket List, or just a "things I want/need to get done" within X number of years. Whether it's things we want to do before we graduate from college, before marriage or kids, or things we want to get done before the next decade sneaks up on us, it's not a bad thing to have goals that motivate and inspire us.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijv02xFK5wl5ONN1XWBbVI2zRjA9-7AOrjJXOcS7zdHAM31OpBVHIyDE4DqlHSK8vFgTWwDvq5nbxS809wSeAQsNSAjEL4QMF5qDHwkxgot5LGj5OAM0fFKfLIi-mfN7QStpWX9njk9tE/s1600/D20thbday.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijv02xFK5wl5ONN1XWBbVI2zRjA9-7AOrjJXOcS7zdHAM31OpBVHIyDE4DqlHSK8vFgTWwDvq5nbxS809wSeAQsNSAjEL4QMF5qDHwkxgot5LGj5OAM0fFKfLIi-mfN7QStpWX9njk9tE/s320/D20thbday.png" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My 20th Birthday...<br />
Taking Selfies before it was cool.</td></tr>
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But sometimes when that deadline arrives <b>it can be tempting to only focus on what we haven't accomplished</b>. As my birthday got closer it was really hard not to think about the fact that I'm not 30-50lbs lighter (<i>hellooo baby weight + the lbs I never lost in my 20s</i>). I have an incredible list of things that I can be proud of and thankful for, but for some reason it was really tempting to only focus on how I failed to reach a certain number on the scale.<br />
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Maybe someone else is disappointed that they never traveled as much as they wanted, or mastered a certain skill, or figured out their vocation in life yet. That's OK. Just because we don't do all the things in the time frame that we imagine for ourselves doesn't necessarily mean that we've wasted time or that we've failed at being a successful 20 or 30 something.<br />
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God is still at work. For all that we don't mark off the lists, there are so many other things that, when we really take the time to think about it, God has done in our lives. <br />
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I haven't been able to find my official "Before 30" list, but as I went through my old journals it reaffirmed what I shared several months ago: In the darkest moments, God was at work. In the happiest moments, God was at work. When I was wrestling with God and discerning my vocation, God was at work. When I felt like my plans were completely falling apart, God was most definitely at work.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-aXvreqS9ZByvaa4_-7-XsSEm_0CDeRDTB7Zs-K4Vq2FQmtoi6dEFXHHhVGPSzEcwGpEJxlXBGW9743mVXac-AaOz69MG5It2AruOu2lHA0h64xU1BkzHYE_zYa0XtSU7xVCjK98j5Vo/s1600/Alexandria+and+Deanna+Christmas+2015.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-aXvreqS9ZByvaa4_-7-XsSEm_0CDeRDTB7Zs-K4Vq2FQmtoi6dEFXHHhVGPSzEcwGpEJxlXBGW9743mVXac-AaOz69MG5It2AruOu2lHA0h64xU1BkzHYE_zYa0XtSU7xVCjK98j5Vo/s640/Alexandria+and+Deanna+Christmas+2015.png" width="560" /></a><br />
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If God can do all that in my 20s, then I'm certain that my 30s are going to be full of more surprises and adventures. I'll probably make a "Before 40" list <strike>in case God needs any ideas</strike>, but I already know God's plans will be better and more fulfilling than what I can dream up for myself. </div>
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No matter where you are in life, no matter how many things you have or haven't marked off your list, remember that God loves you too much to let you stay the same. Our lives are more than a series of "Things to Do". God has a plan and a purpose for each of us, no matter our age or state in life. </div>
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be at peace<br />walk on water<br />be not afraid</h2>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-92078767357352741542016-01-29T13:44:00.000-06:002016-01-29T14:08:20.666-06:00It Hurts Because We're Pro-Life<div style="text-align: justify;">
p a x</div>
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First, I want to thank you all for your emails, comments, messages, and prayers after I shared about <a href="http://www.lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2016/01/this-is-not-cross-i-wanted.html">our miscarriage</a>. My husband and I have felt an incredible amount of support and love from many people over the last month, and we are grateful. <br />
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When people ask how I'm doing I typically respond "I have good days and bad days." I've learned that grieving is a process. There are days when I'm at peace, and there are days when it's hard to smile. </div>
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I've been able to hold myself together pretty well, especially when I'm around other people. Sure, there are a tears that leak out from time to time, but if I cry it isn't much more than that. Last week, however, something happened. I guess it was what folks call a "trigger" and it came without warning.</div>
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And I bawled for the first time since I lost the baby. </div>
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I've cried several times since December 15th, but nothing like this gut wrenching, sobbing, ugly cry. Something set me off and it took me a moment before I was able to calm down and breathe again.</div>
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When the sobbing was over I realized two very important things.</div>
<ol>
<li style="text-align: justify;">I needed to cry to that. I needed a moment to feel the ache of losing our baby. And</li>
<li style="text-align: justify;">hurting like this reminds me that <b>I <i>really am</i> Pro-Life. </b></li>
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It sounds almost silly to say it; it's such a simple truth. We lost a <i>baby</i>. It wasn't a foreign blob of tissue that perhaps someday might become worthy of our care... This was our <i>child</i>. <br />
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My husband and I have always been pro-life Catholics. My high school led the <a href="http://marchforlife.org/">March for Life</a> in 2001, and I participated in the March all 4 years of high school. Both of us have been part of various pro-life efforts in our parishes and dioceses throughout our lives. We've never doubted that a human life is sacred and worth protecting "from the moment of conception to natural death." It just makes sense.</div>
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But there's something about that "<i><b>from the moment of conception</b>" </i>piece that I don't think really hit us until we lost this baby. <br />
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When we found out that we were pregnant with Alexandria we knew she was a baby human, no doubt. But I think that as the pregnancy continued, it became more and more obvious that this was a little person who would make her "humanity" known to me especially by lodging her foot in my rib cage or punching the heck out of my stomach. <br />
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This time it was different. I only carried the baby we lost for 7 weeks. But just because that child hadn't yet formed 10 fingers and 10 toes, didn't make him any less human. From the moment this baby was conceived there was a human being with a soul... a child of God worth loving and protecting. <br />
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As the great Dr. Seuss put it, </div>
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"A person's a person no matter how small." </h2>
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The <a href="http://www.vatican.va/archive/ccc_css/archive/catechism/p3s2c2a5.htm">Catechism of the Catholic Church</a> also articulates this beautifully:</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmzVG4wEbKBF6j8X4Kr3kAP3RX9GBeYVLMXkWEjYQuzBWN7O2Ogs65l_7vJLw0PG9BxwR8zYPsNGu52N30J9Qd1HVBKX3-fF45ZnlEOTnKYSp7wwTWmARmSIfkiYgzy2IBo-I9BEo3mMmH/s1600/CCC2258%2528v1%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmzVG4wEbKBF6j8X4Kr3kAP3RX9GBeYVLMXkWEjYQuzBWN7O2Ogs65l_7vJLw0PG9BxwR8zYPsNGu52N30J9Qd1HVBKX3-fF45ZnlEOTnKYSp7wwTWmARmSIfkiYgzy2IBo-I9BEo3mMmH/s400/CCC2258%2528v1%2529.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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And that is why this hurts. We lost our <i>child. </i>This was not a blob of tissue or a "potential" human being. This was our <i>child</i>, and if we didn't believe that this was a person then I don't think we would feel the ache the way that we do.<br />
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I'm not grieving that we lost <b>what maybe could have eventually turned into a baby</b>. That anyone would dare to say that's the reason why mothers who have experienced miscarriage are mourning is , quite frankly, insulting. <br />
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In a way, I'm grateful for this ache. It hurts because we lost a child, a person with a soul. But that also means that I have the great hope of meeting him someday, which brings me joy and peace. <br />
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Pray for us, Little Saint. We look forward to meeting you someday!<br />
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<h2>
be at peace<br />walk on water<br />be not afraid</h2>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-8704219965164252642016-01-15T11:36:00.001-06:002016-01-15T11:36:51.881-06:00This is Not the Cross I Wanted<div style="text-align: justify;">
p a x</div>
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<i style="text-align: justify;">On December 15th I had a miscarriage. Over the past month I have gone through a roller coaster of emotions, and I am finding ways of healing a day at a time. I believe that writing is going to be extremely helpful in the healing process. I also want to be sensitive to those who may find reading this difficult. I simply ask for your prayers and know that I am praying for all families who have lost children. </i><br />
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This is not how the New Year was supposed to begin. </div>
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I was supposed to hear my baby's heartbeat for the first time at the beginning of this month. I was supposed to be taking a picture of my 11 month old in her "I'm a Big Sister!" onesie and posting it online to announce Baby #2's arrival in August. I'm supposed to be dealing with morning sickness, mood swings, and strange cravings. </div>
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But I'm not.</div>
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When we found out that we were pregnant with our second child, we were a little surprised (but not really), a little overwhelmed (<i>2 under 2</i>!), but so <i>so</i> happy. We bought our first house and moved in a week after we got the news. Everything was coming together. Were finances about to get a little interesting? Oh yes. But our family was growing, and our new house was going to be filled with one more person to love. </div>
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On December 15th it felt like all of this joy and excitement was ripped from us without any warning.</div>
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While my husband and I sat in the ER waiting for the doctors and nurses to come talk to us about what was happening, we started praying the rosary. <b> </b></div>
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<b>First Sorrowful Mystery... The Agony in the Garden.</b> </h2>
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And that's where we were. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijmP-rdQ03ZFZqNRVb6w5JZR_amZUdclTmatE0onLj6qpciVEQCQf8Dg_t77wyprVVJZCFDibqNP4LWVmFFrkrbD8yCw8XDgXin7jqiTsTyYGHAgmULEtqWI47wTFVG1j1PWupnkxE1q0/s1600/crucifix+and+roses2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijmP-rdQ03ZFZqNRVb6w5JZR_amZUdclTmatE0onLj6qpciVEQCQf8Dg_t77wyprVVJZCFDibqNP4LWVmFFrkrbD8yCw8XDgXin7jqiTsTyYGHAgmULEtqWI47wTFVG1j1PWupnkxE1q0/s320/crucifix+and+roses2.jpg" width="320" /></a>Looking back I see how we were having our own "Let this cup pass from me" moment. I remember praying: <i><b>This is an opportunity to show off, Lord. You can save our baby, you can stop the bleeding and keep our Little One safe from harm. We trust you and we have faith. Please God save our child. </b></i></div>
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But as things got progressively worse, I just went numb. And in the midst of going through the miscarriage I kept thinking "I don't want this cross. This hurts too much."</div>
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The day after our ER visit we went to the Adoration Chapel. I wasn't really sure what I wanted to say. Where Christ's words were much more profound: <i>My God, why have you forsaken me?</i>(Mt 27:46)<i> </i>all I managed to get out in the moment was "You're a Jerk." And we left. <br />
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Sure, I know that we're called to "take up [our] cross and follow Him" (Mt 16:24), but this is not the cross I wanted. </div>
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I was angry. I was hurt. None of this made any sense. Why wouldn't God let this cross pass from us? <b>This could have been a miraculous story of healing and trusting the Lord. </b></div>
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A few days later, we drove from Kansas to Memphis to visit family for Christmas. I got really sick along the way (we later found out I had bronchitis and an ear infection), so I was dealing with that<span style="color: lime;"> </span>on top of the physical and emotional discomfort from the miscarriage. At one point the pain became overwhelming, but it was the first time I felt like I could approach the Lord in prayer without anger or hate:</div>
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<i><b>Lord I didn't want this cross. It is not something I would have chosen for myself. But I desire to be close to You. If carrying this cross allows me to be more deeply united to you, I ask that you help me to embrace it... to carry it so close to my heart that it becomes intimately united with Yours. Amen </b> </i><br />
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I wouldn't say the pain went away instantaneously, but praying those words in the backseat of the car led to a moment of peace and surrender. It was just a <i>moment</i>, but it changed everything that has happened since. </div>
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There are still moments when I am angry. I am still hurt. There are times at Mass when I just start crying because I still can't make sense of why this happened. I didn't want this cross, and I know that there will be moments where it will seem impossible to carry it. </div>
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<b>But I am certain that this is a miraculous story of healing and trusting the Lord.</b> </h2>
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I know that God's hand has been with us, guiding us, long before our child was conceived. We have a "Little Saint" in heaven standing before the throne of God interceding for us, and that brings joy to my heart. </div>
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There are difficult moments ahead, especially as our baby's due date draws nearer. <br />
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As many people have told me over the past month, the Blessed Mother knows what it is like to lose an innocent child. In those moments when I'm so angry at God that I can't talk to Him, that's when going to her will be even more important. There's still a lot of hurt, but there's also a lot of healing taking place. </div>
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I really didn't want this cross. It was my biggest fear. At the same time, I draw so much hope and comfort from the fact that this cross, if I choose to embrace it, will bring me into a deeper union with the heart of our Lord. </div>
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This is not the cross I wanted, but I know that He will help me carry it. </div>
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<i>Little Saint, pray for us. </i></div>
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be at peace</div>
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walk on water</div>
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be not afraid</div>
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d*</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-51456784201162276732015-10-20T18:00:00.000-05:002015-10-28T21:08:39.699-05:00Still At the Beginning {2nd Anniversary}<div style="text-align: justify;">
p a x</div>
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<span id="goog_1430218019"></span><span id="goog_1430218020"></span><br /></div>
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On October 5th my husband and I celebrated our second wedding anniversary. Two years... I can hardly believe that much time has passed. We've learned and experienced a lot in these first two years of marriage, but I also realize that we are still very much at the beginning of a lot of new adventures. </div>
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A couple in our parish recently celebrated 50 years of marriage. Before their renewal of vows, the priest spoke about how when a couple walks down the aisle and stands at the foot of the altar on their wedding day<b> they have</b> <b>no idea what they are saying "yes" to. </b> </div>
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Sure, God willing they completely intend every word that is spoken during the exchange of vows, but there's no way for a newlywed couple to anticipate all that will come in the decades ahead, no way to know what that "yes" will cost them. And if we <i>did </i>somehow get a sneak peak of the crosses married life would bring with it, would we be as enthusiastic to say "yes"?</div>
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I can't imagine all that this couple has experienced in the last 50 years of marriage, all of the joys and the sufferings... but I'm sure they would say that it has been completely worth it.<br />
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One of the most beautiful things about the sacrament of marriage is that we receive the grace that we need to say "yes". There's no way we can live out God's<b> </b><b style="font-style: italic;">free, total, faithful, and fruitful</b> love by our own efforts. There's no way we could love unconditionally without some Divine Intervention. The vocation we embrace as married couples is to help our spouses and our children become saints. We need all the extra help we can get!!</div>
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<h2>
The day before our anniversary <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zspz-zqeNbg">this song from the movie</a> "Anastasia" got stuck in my head. </h2>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><i>We were strangers starting out on a journey<br />
Never dreaming what we'd have to go through<br />
Now here we are and I'm suddenly standing<br />
At the beginning with you</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><i>No one told me I was going to find you<br />
Unexpected, what you did to my heart<br />
When I lost hope, you were there to remind me<br />
This is the start...</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Read more: <a href="http://www.metrolyrics.com/at-the-beginning-lyrics-donna-lewis.html#ixzz3oqzpMFbC" style="color: #003399;">Donna Lewis - At The Beginning Lyrics | MetroLyrics</a></span><br />
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In two years of marriage we've learned a lot about ourselves, one another... life... but I know there's still a lot of learning to do. God willing there are still decades worth of new experiences and life lessons ahead of us. The best part of all of this is that we aren't facing any of this on our own. </div>
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In our second year we experienced one of the most exciting new beginnings of all: <a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2015/08/alexandria-great-birth-story.html">the birth of our first child</a>. I think Michael would agree that becoming parents has been one of the most wonderful, happy, frustrating, sleep depriving, sometimes disgusting (did you know there's such a thing as <i>projectile poop?!</i> Neither did we, lesson learned.) and hilarious experiences of our entire lives. And we are so grateful that God called us to this messy vocation :)</div>
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I am looking forward to other beginnings as we enter Year 3. In fact, one "new beginning" is already underway. The night before our anniversary we received a phone call that our offer had been accepted on a house. <b>Our first home! </b>As I'm sure you can imagine, this is a pretty major step for our family. After a lot of prayer and discernment (and a lot of "<i>Are you sure about that Lord?</i>") we are putting down deeper roots. We're excited, surprised, and doing our best to surrender our plans to God's hands. </div>
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What continues to give me peace and joy in the midst of all of these new beginnings is that we aren't going through any of them on our own. God has been part of our story<a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2014/05/howimetmyhusbandpt1.html"> from the very beginning</a> and it is comforting to know that He will continue to be part of every step. </div>
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be at peace<br />walk on water<br />be not afraid</h2>
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<span style="font-size: large;">d*</span></h2>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-3306329243732398342015-08-12T09:45:00.000-05:002015-08-12T09:45:34.389-05:00Alexandria the Great: The Birth Story<div class="separator" style="clear: both;">
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p a x<br />
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This week Alexandria the Great turned 6 months old. I can hardly believe it. <i>Six months</i> since her grand entrance. Six months of taking on the adventure of motherhood one day at a time. </div>
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So in commemoration of making it halfway through her first year of life, I thought I would finally share her birth story...mostly for myself and for the ability to hopefully compare this to other Baby Johnston deliveries in the future.</div>
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(If birth stories aren't your thing, you can scroll down to the bottom and read about how we chose her name. )<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPOZNXmD7hJmDCGLKyU_jhnA0v5Fh0PJocXS7bHqikdVXTru9Nz1NhLhgtvzhizaggqwnsLaE3r4Kn6MbRaYFWwuWcH7NxOoqaG9Svm5B4p_3FmxyHibeGqlYgqqT6VCBtGl1d8zHu68M/s640/blogger-image-1307437642.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPOZNXmD7hJmDCGLKyU_jhnA0v5Fh0PJocXS7bHqikdVXTru9Nz1NhLhgtvzhizaggqwnsLaE3r4Kn6MbRaYFWwuWcH7NxOoqaG9Svm5B4p_3FmxyHibeGqlYgqqT6VCBtGl1d8zHu68M/s320/blogger-image-1307437642.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Let's rewind 25 weeks....</h2>
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I was almost 41 weeks along, and I was tired of being pregnant.</div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgecuudJiZtrIcL4QBoGJdrPKq4OpbjHHDLNBjqGmgFpd9grysshcP_Zpgdz8lqzCfjN8rx2zbc3nP4ueGfbP5tbWPmKIvty8EGu91EAkgtDVIJEr0Mpx7pwAyp_UqcCUa0_rd237-3v10/s640/blogger-image-1849300142.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgecuudJiZtrIcL4QBoGJdrPKq4OpbjHHDLNBjqGmgFpd9grysshcP_Zpgdz8lqzCfjN8rx2zbc3nP4ueGfbP5tbWPmKIvty8EGu91EAkgtDVIJEr0Mpx7pwAyp_UqcCUa0_rd237-3v10/s320/blogger-image-1849300142.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This was after walking up and down the most enormous hill we could find in town. </td></tr>
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Sure, I understood that it was called an "<i>estimated</i> due date", but when February 4th came and went and I still didn't have a baby it felt like Christmas without any presents. <i><b>Where was my baby?</b></i></div>
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Baby Johnston was showing no signs of making an appearance any time soon. </div>
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I was tired. I was sore. Sleeping at night was nearly impossible, heartburn was vicious as ever, and it felt like Baby J was nuzzling further up into my rib cage instead of making the journey south. I was enjoying Downton Abbey & Gilmore Girls marathons with Mom, but what I really wanted was my baby. And I was getting impatient. </div>
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On the morning of Monday the 9th we went to an appointment with the doctor to discuss what would be best for me and for baby. We had originally scheduled an induction for that night, but we decided we were willing to wait a little longer. <br />
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We asked Doctor P if we could go in on Wednesday evening to be induced, but when he told us he would be gone and would have to request another doctor, we decided to schedule the induction for Tuesday night, with the hopes that we would have a baby by Wednesday morning. Wednesday was the Feast of Our Lady of Lourdes, and that actually gave me a sense of peace as we moved forward. </div>
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When we got home from the appointment I ate lunch, and then slept the rest of the afternoon. I had felt what I thought were <i>maybe</i> contractions earlier that day, but I wasn't getting my hopes up. I was tired. And frustrated. And still pregnant. (Cue violin)</div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I finally got up around 5:45, and Mom wanted me to go walk the mall with her. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Before leaving the house, we talked about what would happen if my water broke. I told my Mom about <a href="http://www.whattoexpect.com/pregnancy/symptoms-and-solutions/water-breaking-during-pregnancy.aspx" target="_blank">this article</a> that had been my daily pregnancy email. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">"Oh don't worry," I said. "Only 15% of women's water break before labor begins, so I think I'm good." Mom commented on how surprisingly low that sounded, but we both agreed that the chances of my water breaking were so low that it wasn't worth worrying about... plus after the appointment I'd had with the doctor that morning I figured I'd be pregnant <strike>forever</strike> until I was induced. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">Around 6:40pm we left the house, leaving my husband to cook dinner while we drove over to the mall across the street. When we walked into the store I noticed a rack of men's pajama pants on clearance, and remembered that Michael needed another pair or two. I couldn't remember his size so I gave him a call while my Mom went to another section of the store. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue Light', HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;"><b>Me</b>: "Hey! PJ pants are on sale. What size do you wear?"</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Him</b>: "Let me check... hold on a second. Large I think, yes Large."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Me</b>: "Michael?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Him</b>: "Yes?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Me</b>: "My water just broke."</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">And with that, I became one of the 15%! Feeling particularly grateful that I had changed out of my skirt and into my super absorbent yoga pants, I waddled to the back of the store, found Mom and informed her that it was GO TIME. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I'm not sure if any of the JcPenny employees heard this exciting announcement, but after verifying that I hadn't leaked all over their floor we got in the car and headed back across the street to pack things up for the hospital. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">When I got back in the house Michael was busy grabbing our <i>mostly </i>packed hospital bag, and trying to find little things like chargers, toothbrushes, etc. I, on the other hand, was having a minor internal spaz attack:</span></div>
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<b><i>The house is a mess!</i> </b></h3>
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<b><i>What is the baby going to wear when we go home? </i></b></h3>
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<b><i>Heck, what am I going to name this baby?</i></b></h3>
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<b><i>What if this baby doesn't get the right name?!</i></b></h3>
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<i><b>I'm hungry. I haven't eaten since lunch.</b></i><i><b>I can't eat! I'm having a baby.<br /> </b></i><i><b>But I should eat.</b></i><i><b>But I can't!</b></i></h3>
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Michael and Mom tried to convince me that I needed to eat before I left, but I couldn't figure out what I wanted, and I was in "GO mode". (This would later prove to be a mistake <b>that will not be repeated</b> with future Baby Johnston Deliveries.)</div>
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Right about the time we were packing the car was also when those contractions kicked in. <br />
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Oh boy.<br />
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We got to the Women's Center a little after 7pm. I'm not sure what I expected...maybe I'd seen too many TV shows or movies where the woman pulls up to the hospital and the nurses rush her to the delivery room in a wheelchair. I was surprised by how <i>calm </i>everyone was. I waddled my way to the delivery room, put on their <i>ever so elegant</i> hospital gown, got hooked up to the machines, and signed some paperwork. </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Time to get this party started!<span style="text-align: justify;"> </span></td></tr>
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Doctor P came by around 11pm to check on things. Because Baby Johnston had already pooped in utero, he said
that we really needed to get the baby out in the next 22 hours. This
meant we needed pitocin to help me progress, which meant those lovely
contractions that I thought I was handling so well were about to get a
whole lot more intense. </div>
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And boy did they. </div>
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I remember the nurse asking me, "So what are we doing for pain management?". I just sort of chuckled and said "I'd like to make it as long as I can without anything, but we'll see what happens!"</div>
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And on the inside I really felt like: </div>
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and a little bit of </div>
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In hindsight, I really wasn't prepared to have a "natural" childbirth. </div>
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Sure, I'd read a few articles, glanced at a few books, but we didn't really have a plan for dealing with the pain. Yes, I had my bouncy ball. We did the tennis balls in the sock thing to rub my lower back... And my husband did an <i>amazing</i> of helping me focus and breathe through each contraction. In fact, without his encouragement and gentle presence I couldn't have made it as long as I did without drugs. <br />
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But after about 4 hours of tears, I knew that the only way we were going to progress was if we got the epidural. </div>
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As the <i>surprisingly peppy for 3:45am</i> anesthisiologist prepped me, I felt really guilty. I thought about how much the epidural would add to our hospital bill, and I also felt like I had somehow failed by not pushing through the pain. <br />
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But then the epidural went in...<br />And I'm pretty sure the heavens opened. </h3>
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That epidural was the BEST decision I made for myself that day. </div>
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As soon as the epidural kicked in I went to sleep. Just like that. I was relaxed enough that things could move along, and Michael was able to get some sleep as well. </div>
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I woke up around 7:30am and I was still feeling really good and loving that epidural. My Mom came in to trade places with Michael so he could run home real quick to get something. Our home is 4 min away from the hospital so it wasn't a big deal for him to leave. <br />
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<h3>
Let me mention here, my Mom is amazing.</h3>
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Not only did she stay in the waiting room praying throughout the night for us, but she was affirming and encouraging throughout the entire labor. And she even held my barf bag when Michael left, so she gets major points in Heaven for that ;). </div>
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The nurses came in to check me and happily reported that I was fully dilated, and it would be time to push in about 30 min. "We're going to do a practice push," she said. I started pushing and then she shouted, "STOP! STOP! This baby is coming! And that baby has a lot of hair! We need to get the doctor...DO NOT PUSH ANYMORE." </div>
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At which point I called my husband and told him to come back <u>now</u>. It was Go Time. </div>
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Doctor P finally came in around 9am and the team assembled. </div>
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Because of how alarmed the nurse had been during my practice push, I really thought that this baby was just going to slide right on out. Like maybe 2 pushes and boom, baby. Right?</div>
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Um. Nope.</div>
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This is going to sound silly but <b>I had no idea how hard pushing was going to be. </b>You'd think I would have picked up on that... I mean I was pushing a human being out of me...kind of a big deal. <br />
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My epidural was <i>just</i> wearing off, so could feel enough pressure to push, but there wasn't any pain. <br />
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I had two nurses on my left, Michael on my right, and Dr. P ready to catch. I remember thinking that I had a "good" nurse and a "bad" nurse... but really they were both just encouraging me in different ways, and I needed both of them there. <br />
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I pushed. Nothing. <br />
I pushed again. Something, but not enough. <br />
About 4 or 5 pushes and I realized this was going to be one of the hardest things I had ever done (Again, silly aha moment). <br />
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Dr. P finally said, "If we can't get the baby out on this next push, I'm going to need to help things a little bit." Pretty much all I heard was "I will cut you." <br />
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Um.. call those the words of inspiration that I needed because with that, I pushed like I had never pushed before, and all of a sudden... I could breathe.<br />
<span style="text-align: start;"><br /></span>
<span style="text-align: start;">The doctor had told me the night before that once baby came out they were going to need to suction the baby's lungs before handing the baby to me because of the meconium. I'm really glad that he had prepared me for that, otherwise I probably would have been scared and worried that he wasn't handing me my child immediately<span style="color: blue;">. </span></span><br />
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I waited for someone to shout "IT'S A___" but no one said anything. I remember feeling like things had gone quiet for a moment... then I heard the baby cry... but no one said anything to me. Finally, I turned to Michael and asked "Is it a girl or a boy?" "Umm.. I don't know yet..." he said, and then finally Dr. P jumped in, "Oh I'm sorry! Not doing my job, it's a GIRL!"</div>
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It took a few moments for them to give her to me, but when we finally met, it was love at first sight. <a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2015/06/newadventure.html" target="_blank">You can read about that moment over here</a>. But long story short, meeting my daughter, seeing her for the first time, was like getting just a tiny snapshot of the infinite and miraculous love of God. <br />
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Mind. blown. </div>
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Baby Johnston Gets a Name</h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEju_vJSq3A_xxhjurMlxBeBzMDqt15LHFrNpnpGOmOysn2Tk6tiHo7q4WMl8AuXoPM7K82SuYQM4Pv9S25aDZSgdiTWosCiOOVizP9W-Kq-rrEZmC-TEdL49oGpc-puahranXIeAb-LeV4/s1600/Alexandria+Elise+Meaning.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEju_vJSq3A_xxhjurMlxBeBzMDqt15LHFrNpnpGOmOysn2Tk6tiHo7q4WMl8AuXoPM7K82SuYQM4Pv9S25aDZSgdiTWosCiOOVizP9W-Kq-rrEZmC-TEdL49oGpc-puahranXIeAb-LeV4/s400/Alexandria+Elise+Meaning.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue Light, HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">One of the benefits of not knowing if "Baby Johnston" was a boy or a girl was that I felt like we could go to the hospital with options. We'd come up with our top 2 girl and 2 boy names, and figured once we met the baby we'd know. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue Light, HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue Light, HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">It took a little while, but we settled on Alexandria Elise. Alexander is the name of my Great Great Grandfather on my Mom's side. I have a male cousin named after him, and I thought we might bring it back with a feminine touch :). </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue Light, HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue Light, HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">And Elise? Well, that was a name that I happened to come across during a meeting with parents preparing to baptize their baby. I thought it was pretty. Boom.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue Light, HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br />The meanings of her names are what I like the most. When I hear "Defender of Mankind" it makes me imagine how God will work through her as she grows. And the meaning of Elise, "pledged to God" reminds me that my prayer from day one has been that she will be the woman God created her to be. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue Light, HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br />Usually the first question people ask me after I tell them her name is "What are you going to call her?" Five syllables is a lot for one kid, I know. Still, we call her Alexandria (the Great). It's a big name, but I have a feeling it's going to fit her just fine :). Some folks call her Alex, my family calls her Lexie, but her Dad and I will most likely always call her Alexandria....</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue Light, HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue Light, HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">....at least until we mix her name up with her siblings!</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue Light, HelveticaNeue-Light, helvetica, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br />And there you have it, the story of how Alexandria the Great came into the world and got her name! </span></span></div>
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Thank you Jesus for our beautiful baby girl, </div>
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and for trusting us with the great task of being her parents. </div>
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be at peace<br />walk on water<br />be not afraid</h2>
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d*</h2>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-16552829753864561292015-07-08T20:54:00.000-05:002015-07-08T23:03:03.050-05:00What God Can Do in a Decadep a x<br />
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<br />
I really like "Timehop" and the "On this Day" apps. It's always entertaining and sometimes surprising to see a snapshot of what I was up to several years ago. <br />
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<div style="text-align: justify;">
One day I was scrolling through those memories and it occurred to me that <i>a lot </i>has happened over the past 10 years. If you had told me at 19 years old that over the next decade I would travel to two other countries, live abroad for a year, get a job in<span style="background-color: white;"> Southwest </span>Kansas, teach Theology of the Body in English and Spanish, marry a man <a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2014/05/howimetmyhusbandpt1.html" target="_blank">I met on the internet</a>, <a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2013/11/a-few-moments-with-francis.html" target="_blank">meet the Pope</a>, earn a Masters degree in Theology, and then have a baby.... I probably would have thought you were insane.</div>
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There's just no way I would have been able to process all of that.<br />
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19 was a dark time for me. I was getting ready to go into my sophomore year of college, I was living at home, my Mom was dealing with a debilitating illness (which was hard on the whole family), and I was also struggling through some serious addictions and pain of my own.</div>
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<b>At 19, I thought my brokenness was only going to get more broken</b>. Sure, there were good days. But I was hurting, and I was looking for happiness, love, and peace in all the wrong places. What I didn't realize at the time was that while I thought my wounds were only getting larger, God was already at work doing some major heart surgery.<br />
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When I look back at the last decade as a whole, I can't help but see how God laid a foundation over the years, and how each step had an influence on the next. </div>
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I went from studying Italian to Spanish, which led to a study abroad adventure in Costa Rica. That experienced inspired me to want to serve as a missioner in Mexico for a year after graduation, which led to a job in Texas. The highlight of that year in Texas was being exposed to Theology of the Body on an even deeper level and meeting my husband. That new found love of TOB led to a job in Southwest Kansas, where I've been for almost 5 years. Being in Dodge City connected me and my husband to<span style="background-color: white;"> a </span>MA Theology program, which is how we ended up in Rome with Pope Francis over our honeymoon. And our graduation present? Baby Johnston :)<br />
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Of course, those are just the major highlights, but I know that there were even more moments and experiences that God used to draw me closer to Himself over the years. </div>
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Now here I am at 29... a <b>married mother in ministry</b>. </h2>
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God
used some of the darkest, most challenging, and most inspiring
experiences lead me to where I am now. I'm still growing, I'm still in
formation, and God is still faithful, even when I'm at my worst.</div>
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There's a song by Gungor called "<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OR7VOKQ0xJY" target="_blank">Beautiful Things</a>". The entire song moves me. The beginning of the first verse goes:<br />
<h3 style="text-align: center;">
<i><span style="color: #38761d;">All this pain,<br />I wonder if I'll ever find my way,<br />I wonder if this life could really change at all.</span></i></h3>
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Then refrain and bridge articulate exactly what comes to mind when I reflect on the last decade:<br />
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<span style="color: #38761d;"><i>You make beautiful things... out of the dust. <br /> </i><i>You make beautiful things...out of us. </i><i><br />You make me new, you are making me new.</i></span></h3>
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God's plan for our lives is more incredible than anything we can imagine for ourselves. If I've learned anything over the past decade, it's that God will make something beautiful out of our brokenness, <b>but we have to let Him into it</b>. </div>
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Sometimes it is really difficult to see the "bigger picture", and it is easy to forget that God is at work in each and every moment. I still struggle with this. <br />
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I don't always remember to look at where I am in my journey or actively discern what the next steps might be. Yes, God can do so much over the years... but am I open to what He is doing in my life <i><u>right now</u></i>? Do I realize that if I'm willing to give God each day, one moment at a time, He can do the impossible? </div>
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<br /><span style="background-color: white;">Maybe you've
experienced a dark moment in your own journey. Maybe that's where you
are right now, and it's hard to see hope or how God could possibly bring healing
into the situation. If I can give any encouragement, it would be to be patient with yourself and be patient with God. God loves us too much to leave us exactly where we are, and He really can make something beautiful out of the darkest and most broken pieces of ourselves. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white;">While I may not be dealing with the same things I was ten years ago, I know God is still healing my heart and preparing me for even more adventures that will lead me even further out of the boat. More than anything I hope that I can continue to learn to give God one moment at a time, and to cling to His promise, "<i>Behold, I make all things new" </i>(Rev 21:5)</span></div>
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be at peace<br />walk on water<br />be not afraid</h2>
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d*</h3>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-81224970889085360322015-06-13T15:31:00.003-05:002015-06-13T15:31:45.446-05:00The New Adventure<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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p a x </h2>
Just one year ago my husband and I were preparing to share <a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2014/06/areyouexpecting.html" target="_blank">the big news</a> with our families. We were excited, nervous, and morning sickness was becoming part of my regular schedule. "Baby J" would be arriving in February... but I had no idea of just how much this little one was going to change our lives. <br />
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There's a quote in the Catechism of the Catholic Church that I've come to love ever since studying and teaching Theology of the Body:</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkfRneszk-DF-twJQ5hKqQk5hgqTTsbneDfHHck4KBvEWoczroPdF46PNm6A6NoNIuTr5YA2HgwO3edeJZARkBWJYKji-Fm_ON5R2hGlXrImcwu4CfygM8eKMclfVg39__w48c62BnWqY/s1600/CCC+221+God+is+an+Eternal+Exchange+of+Love.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; text-align: justify;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkfRneszk-DF-twJQ5hKqQk5hgqTTsbneDfHHck4KBvEWoczroPdF46PNm6A6NoNIuTr5YA2HgwO3edeJZARkBWJYKji-Fm_ON5R2hGlXrImcwu4CfygM8eKMclfVg39__w48c62BnWqY/s320/CCC+221+God+is+an+Eternal+Exchange+of+Love.jpg" width="320" /></a><i></i></div>
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<i><i>God has revealed His innermost secret: God Himself is an Eternal exchange of love, Father, Son and Holy Spirit, and He has destined us to share in that exchange (CCC 221). </i></i></div>
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<i><br /></i></div>
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I'm sure many different theologians have said something like this, but I will always remember hearing Christopher West talk about how a husband and wife are called to participate in <b>God's life giving love</b>. This exchange of love is so powerful <b>that nine months later they could be giving that love a name. </b></div>
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On February 10th at 9:22am, we named that love Alexandria. </div>
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When Alexandria Elise was held up for me to see and brought to my arms for the first time I was breathless. I don't know if I will ever be able to adequately put into words the joy and awe of meeting my daughter. <i><b>God is an eternal exchange of love...and he has destined us to share in the exchange.</b> </i>And we did! And there she was!<br />
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She was placed in my arms and we just stared at one another. It was love at first sight. "You were so worth it." I said, over and over again. Every pain, every discomfort, the long wait for her arrival, the pain of childbirth... it was all worth it because she was right here. </div>
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Over the last four months I've realized that this is a whole new chapter in the journey. As I continue the daily adventure in motherhood and I know that I still have lots to learn. Life has changed for our family, but in a more wonderful and profound way than I could have ever thought possible. <br />
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I feel like I've grown a lot over the past year. It's hard for me to imagine what life was like before Alexandria came into our lives. But more than anything I recognize the reality of CCC 221: God has destined us to participate in His life giving love... and I am humbled by and grateful for this vocation of motherhood.<br />
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This is a new adventure. The call to "get out of the boat" is stronger than ever, and I recognize that in this new adventure, we're called to trust God with <u><i>everything</i></u>, just like He's always called us to do. <br />
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Life out of the boat will be different, more exciting, perhaps even at little scary at times (and I'm not just talking about the blog! ;)). Yet, I already know that it will be 100% worth the effort. <br />
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God has blessed us with a beautiful, happy, and healthy baby girl and she is a reflection of that "eternal exchange of love" in which God has called us to participate. <br />
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I'm looking forward to sharing this adventure with you all!<br />
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be at peace<br />walk on water<br />be not afraid</h2>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-22102985095389095852015-01-18T17:14:00.001-06:002015-01-18T17:14:02.567-06:00Learning How to Look at Others<div style="text-align: justify;">
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There's a little detail in this Sunday's Gospel reading that made me pause and think about how I approach ministry. </div>
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It's one of the classic moments in the Gospels, where we hear about the Call of the First Disciples in <a href="http://usccb.org/bible/john/1:35" target="_blank">John 1:35-42</a>. Two of John the Baptist's disciples decide to follow Jesus, which leads to Jesus telling them to <b><i>"Come and see..."</i></b>. Then Andrew, one of the two, goes and gets his brother Simon Peter and tells him "<b>We have found the Messiah"</b> and then he takes his brother to Jesus. </div>
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And this is where I think it gets really interesting. It doesn't say that Andrew took Peter to Jesus and then Jesus started preaching to the group. It also doesn't say that Peter showed up and Jesus started rattling off orders of what he needed to do. </div>
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It says: <i><b>Jesus looked at him...</b></i></div>
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Those words really made me think for a second. <br />
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It's such a small detail... I mean, you'd <i>assume </i>Jesus was looking a Peter when they met for the first time. But the fact that John 1:42 specifically says "<b><i>Jesus <u>looked at him</u>"</i></b><i> </i>before going on about the big moment when Jesus tells him what he is going to be called, makes me think that Jesus wasn't so much concerned with pushing his own plans on Peter as he was focused on recognizing who Peter was. <i> </i></div>
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<b>Jesus <u>looked at him</u>. </b></h2>
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This is a skill that can be tempting to forget, especially when we're involved in ministry of any kind. It's easy to hear about someone's situation and say "Oh well you just need to get your kid baptized..." or "You should get your marriage convalidated so you can return to the sacraments...". It's easy to <i>tell </i>people that "all they need is Jesus", or that they just need to pray a certain prayer, or better yet that they just need to go talk to the priest, or counselor. And all of those things may very well be true! Sometimes we really <i>do</i> need to enthusiastically encourage people to get involved in the life of the parish and invite them to go deeper in their faith journeys. </div>
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<b>But before any of that can happen, we have to be able to <i>see </i>people. </b></div>
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I know for myself working in full-time to ministry, there can, at times, be a temptation to just go through the paperwork for baptism or marriage preparation without ever really getting to know the people sitting in my office. It's easy to fill out census forms, hand people checklists, and pass on my business card. It's another thing entirely to step back and spend time getting to know <i>who</i> someone is, and<i> listen to their story. </i></div>
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When I think about the moment that Jesus looked at Simon Peter, I don't think it was an awkward silence or stare down from Jesus before giving the poor guy a new name. I think was more like Jesus' eyes met Peter's, he probably gave one of those classic Jesus smiles, and Jesus' heart was full of love and compassion for this new disciple for whom God had some pretty big plans. I mean, <i>spoiler alert, </i>he called him "Cephas" (which means "rock"). </div>
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Jesus looked at Peter and all of the disciples as <i>children of God</i> first as foremost, which means he loved them as God does from that very first encounter. </div>
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It makes me wonder, do I see people the way that Jesus does? Do I care about who they are and what their unique story is? Do I see them as <i>children of God</i> or do I see them as another person who needs another "thing" and then send them on their way? </div>
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Honestly, there are moments where I fail big time in this area. A couple will show up 15 or 20 minutes late for their appointment, they will be gruff or short with me, and in the end I'm just happy to get the meeting over with. But then there are other times in which I really get to know a person or their family and I hear incredible stories. </div>
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I get to hear stories like the mom who wasn't coming to Mass every weekend, but her husband had died a few months earlier and she was finally at the point of functioning again and finding hope in her faith. </div>
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Or the adults who grew up far away from any kind of faith life or spirituality and have discovered the beauty of the Catholic Church and are hungry for more. </div>
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Or the couple who comes in wanting to start marriage preparation after decades of cohabiting because they have had an encounter with Christ through a retreat or prayer service and are longing for the sacraments. <br />
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There are some inspiring and beautiful stories that I get to hear, often when I least expect it. But it requires taking the time to really see people, and to focus on who they are more than what I can offer them. </div>
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Before we send people off to another formation program, or tell them to talk to a priest, or give them paperwork to fill out, we have to <b>look at them. </b> We are called to <i>look at them</i>, to <i>love them</i> and to <i>hear their story</i>. <br />
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Sometimes what people need to hear before the checklist or form are pulled out is that <b>we recognize who they are as a brother or sister in Christ</b> and that we care. </div>
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<i>Lord, teach us how to <u>look at others</u>. </i></div>
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<i>Teach us how to see them as you see them, </i></div>
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<i>and to love them as you love them. </i></div>
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<i>Give us the eyes to see, the ears to hear, and the heart to love.</i></div>
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<i>Amen. </i> </div>
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<i>Give me Your eyes for just one second<br />
Give me Your eyes so I can see<br />
Everything that I keep missing<br />
Give me Your love for humanity<br />
Give me Your arms for the broken-hearted<br />
The ones that are far beyond my reach<br />
Give me Your heart for the ones forgotten<br />
Give me Your eyes so I can see</i></div>
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be at peace<br />walk on water<br />be not afraid</h2>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-46843149792664448322015-01-06T22:19:00.001-06:002015-01-06T22:43:42.552-06:002015 Word of the Year: Bep a x<br />
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At the beginning of 2014 I really felt called to embrace the words "<b>Your will, not mine, be done</b>." Six words, sprinkled with lessons in <i>surrender</i> and <a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2014/01/the-pain-beauty-of-humility.html" target="_blank"><i>humility</i></a>. I knew it wasn't going to be a piece of cake, but I don't think I realized how God would lead me to learning the significance of those words in every aspect of my life.<br />
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Sure, I knew it was going to be a busy year: thesis writing, new changes and challenges in ministry, plus we were just navigating through our first year of marriage, which is a whole new adventure in itself. But I think the place where God really taught me the meaning of those words was when we were trying to get pregnant. It took me a little while to realize that "<b>Your will not mine be done</b>" is NOT the same as "<b>My will should be done</b> <b>on my timeline</b>." Go figure. In the end, I realized that <a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2014/06/areyouexpecting.html" target="_blank">God's timing is absolutely perfect</a>, and His will and plans are much better than anything I could come up with on my own.<br />
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Now here we are at the first week of 2015.<br />
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When I was praying about what the "word" for the New Year might be, I was surprised by how short and simple the answer was: <b>BE. </b>While that word doesn't seem like much, I feel called to live it out in on three different levels:<br />
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Be {still and know that I am GOD}.</h2>
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Psalm 46:10</h2>
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In a world of constant <i>go go go! </i>and schedules that are always full of something.... then add a baby on top of all of that, it's extremely easy to get caught up in the <b>things to do</b> and forget the simplest of tasks: to <b>be still </b>and simply <b>be with God</b>. No lofty or complex spiritual plans or agenda... just the constant reminder to <b>be still </b>and acknowledge that God is God, and I am not. That's more important than trying to read 10 spiritual books or telling myself I'll pray the rosary every single day before breakfast (though those are great goals to have!). It all begins with learning to be still, to be silent, and to really soak in who God is. </div>
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<b>Be {in the moment}.</b></h2>
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<b><i>"Be strong and courageous, do not be terrified do not be
discouraged, for the LORD your GOD is with you wherever you go." -
Joshua 1:9 </i></b></div>
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As I step into my new role as Mom I know that there are many <b>new moments </b>ahead. There will be beautiful moments of soaking in the the miracle of life, the joy of being a parent, and how our lives have been changed forever. And of course there will also be some sleepless nights, diaper bombs, a lot of tears from both Mom and baby, and I'm sure there will be times of wondering whether I'm really cut out to do this.<br />
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But no matter what I am facing, beautiful or frustrating, I need to remember to step back and just <b>be in the moment</b>. This is a new adventure! It's going to be a year of humbling moments mixed with baby giggles and spit up :). In every moment, every struggle and every success, I need to learn to just be in the moment. This will mean letting go of my expectations at times, and soaking in whatever it is we are facing. </div>
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<b>Be {Deanna}. </b></h2>
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When I was thinking about this last one I wondered if it was a little silly or childish to say it this way. But the more I think about it, the more I realize it might be one of the more challenging aspects of life this year. This year I'm going to learn a lot about myself, and discovering my role as "Mom" is just a small part of that. I really want to be the woman that God created me to be. I want to embrace who that is. I want to be authentic and honest with myself, and not get distracted by trying to fit a perfect image of what I <i>think</i> the world expects me to be. Of all of the models of Motherhood and Femininity, <a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2013/09/confession-of-bride-to-be-battling.html" target="_blank">Our Blessed Mother is really the only one that I should be striving to imitate</a>. Knowing myself, this will be a hard one. But I think that learning to<b> be still </b>and to <b>be in the moment</b> are going to help me to be myself.</div>
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2015 is going to be a great year. In just a few more weeks our first child will come into the world and life will be different. As tempting as it is to worry or wonder about the unknowns of this year, I'm more excited knowing that God is faithful and that His plans are far beyond <i>anything</i> I could imagine for myself or my family. </div>
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I am looking forward to learning how to "be". </div>
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What is your word of the year?</div>
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be at peace<br />walk on water<br />be not afraid</h2>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-1127636321249224772014-11-04T21:29:00.000-06:002014-11-04T21:29:31.502-06:00Settling into a New Month and a New Vocation<h2 style="text-align: justify;">
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There's something very refreshing about flipping the calendar to a new month. It's one of those little "resets" that we get 12 times a year.</div>
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Didn't get everything done I was supposed to do last month? That's OK. New Month.</div>
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Didn't do as well on my personal or spiritual goals the last few weeks? That's OK. New Month. </div>
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Of course, that <i>refreshing new month </i>feeling quickly turns into <i>What do you mean the month's half over?!</i> panic if I don't pay attention. But for the most part a new month means "Deep Breath. Let's start again." </div>
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So here we are in November. </div>
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At the beginning of every month I usually take some time to
figure out my major goals, projects, tasks, etc. for work and at
home, and try to get a sense of what my schedule will be like for the
next 4+ weeks. This month is no exception, and it turns out I've got plenty to keep me busy between now and Christmas... and then life slows down for a moment while I finish making this baby. </div>
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But in the midst of goal setting and calendar sorting, I'm also finding myself trying to balance the busyness of the month and just enjoying the moment. Yes, there are classes to teach, presentations to give, paperwork to complete, and plenty of unscheduled excitement that ministry provides on a daily basis. Yet as I slip into the third-trimester of this pregnancy, I'm becoming more aware that I need to just enjoy the day, the week, the month, and not worry so much about the things to come.</div>
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And trust me, I tend to lean towards the <i>worrier</i> sometimes. I know for a fact that there's <i>plenty</i> of
things for me to potentially worry about. Like some of the presentations I'm
giving over the next two months, getting things ready at my office before I head out for maternity leave, preparing the house for Baby J...</div>
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...OR even just the reality that <b>we're having a baby...</b> This little person is making his/her grand appearance in about 13 weeks and I have no idea what to expect. That's a little overwhelming sometimes. </div>
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So I have a choice. </div>
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I can spend the next 13 weeks worrying over details at work, freaking out over the fact that I really don't know what life will be like when Baby J arrives, plus a million other things I haven't even thought to about yet....</div>
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OR I can enjoy this moment. This day. This week. This month. </div>
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Because things will get done, plans will be made, and this baby will arrive all in the proper time. </div>
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Plus, let's face it. Life is going to be a lot different come the end of January or beginning of February. Becoming a Mom <b><i>ain't no small thing!</i></b> This vocation is taking on a whole new level of "Jesus I Trust in You!" and that's exciting! </div>
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But I need to be at peace.</div>
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I need to rest in the moment and allow God to continue working on my heart and soul. </div>
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Yes, there are details to sort through. There's work to be done in preparation for being away from the office, and there's practical "nesting" like things that I need to start doing at home. There's probably some books I should be reading about childbirth (started one. it was terrifying.), and I know I need to make time for the breastfeeding and birthing classes.</div>
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Still, with each week and each new month I know the ultimate goal is simply to <b>be at peace</b> and to rest in the moment with God. </div>
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There's no amount of reading or specific number of classes that will perfectly prepare me for the months ahead. One of the best things I can do for myself, my husband, and our baby is to strive to allow God to form me into the woman He wants me to be. That won't happen with "to-do lists" or even the perfect birth plan. </div>
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I need to be at peace. I need to listen. I need to trust. And I need to focus on Christ.<br />
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Surely, motherhood will be one of the best "life out of the boat" experiences to date!<br />
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be at peace<br />walk on water<br />be not afraid</h2>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-89589395422281609172014-09-25T18:01:00.000-05:002014-09-25T18:01:21.611-05:00The One Thing I Did Well This Summerp a x<br />
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After graduating from the MA Theology program in May I had <i>such plans</i> for the summer! Oh the books I would read! The movies we would watch! The home projects I would accomplish! There would be wedding photos in albums and on the walls, I'd finally unpack all those boxes hiding in the closet in our basement, and I'd finally have time to blog. I just <i>knew </i>that we'd get to September and I'd look back fondly on our summer adventures, proud of all that was accomplished during the last few months.<br />
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And here we are on the third day of Fall, and what did Deanna do this summer?<br />
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Well, I only finished one or two books... There's <i>one</i> wedding photo in a frame currently sitting up against the living room wall (because I can't decide where to hang it), and those boxes in the basement? Yeah, they are still there.<br />
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But you know what I did do this summer? I grew a baby human. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBt7RrGbYRwoS6Jv7LdhGP5hbho2_0NwUa-fYUaaoJvCCzqpLigmmSpgeiJo4smme46y8R0kJJjQtrGKn4nT9a0WIg_qjjIa87j4zDFs8R0b19X_9OahL3ImdPeI82pKznQoY5Z1bCq-A/s1600/baby+j-profile.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBt7RrGbYRwoS6Jv7LdhGP5hbho2_0NwUa-fYUaaoJvCCzqpLigmmSpgeiJo4smme46y8R0kJJjQtrGKn4nT9a0WIg_qjjIa87j4zDFs8R0b19X_9OahL3ImdPeI82pKznQoY5Z1bCq-A/s1600/baby+j-profile.jpg" height="640" width="528" /></a></div>
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Yup. That was my summer project. Since June, Baby J has grown from the size of a poppy seed to the size of a small banana. Baby J has arms and legs, fingers and toes, eyes, ears, a mouth, and is a big fan of kicking me in the bladder repeatedly...</div>
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And it is <i>wonderful. </i><br />
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On June 2nd during my lunch break I decided to take a pregnancy test since my husband was home with me. This was probably the 4th or 5th stick I had peed on in the last few months, so I figured this would just be business as usual. But when I looked at the stick, saw that undeniable plus sign in the circle, <b>stuff.got.real</b>. </div>
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After months of praying about it and really giving our best effort at discerning God's plan for our family, God said yes, and something pretty incredible happened. </div>
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A new life. A baby human. <i>Our</i> baby. <br />
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I won't lie, this summer has not been the most comfortable. Kneeling before the porcelain god to occasionally deposit my last snack, the constant acid reflux, and the 12am and 3am trips to the bathroom are not my favorite. Sure, baby bumps are cute, but figuring out how to dress myself when there are extra curves everywhere... that's a little frustrating. </div>
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I've also come to accept that gas is just part of my life now, Sometimes I'm just going to cry for no apparent reason (like last night when my husband asked if I wanted to do squats and I burst into uncontrollable tears for 10 minutes. For real.), and midday naps are a real treat when I can get one in. </div>
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But even with all of the discomforts, and the massive of list of things I <i>didn't </i>accomplish this summer, it was truly one of my most productive summers yet. </div>
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There's a human being growing inside of me. A little person, that God already knows and loves, is now part of our family. I think those words from Scripture hit a little bit closer to home now:</div>
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Wonderful indeed! I don't know who Baby Johnston will be, what plans God has for him or her... but we've been entrusted with the great gift of this child. And sure, I'm the one carrying this kid around for another 19 weeks and providing for all of his/her physical needs, God is doing something even more miraculous.</div>
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"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,<br />before you were born I dedicated you..."<br />Jeremiah 1:5</h2>
He <i>knows</i> our baby. He's known our baby since before he or she was conceived. <i><u>Incredible</u></i>!!!<br />
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I am proud of the fact that I've grown a baby human for the past 21 weeks and will continue to do so 24:7 for the next few months. But I am also humbled by the fact that <b>God is doing something truly miraculous here</b> and He's entrusted us with the great responsibility and honor of being parents. </div>
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Motherhood/Pregnancy is a whole new <i>Life Out of the Boat</i> adventure, but I look forward to seeing what God has in store for all of us over the months and years to come. </div>
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Praying for all expectant mothers, especially those who are facing a particularly challenging pregnancy! </div>
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<i>St. Gerard & St. Anne, pray for us!</i></div>
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be at peace<br />walk on water<br />be not afraid<br />d*</h2>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-64358700473473344812014-06-26T18:30:00.001-05:002014-06-26T18:39:52.238-05:00How the One Question You Aren't Supposed to Ask Helped My Spiritual Lifep a x<br />
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It was about mid-March when I met with a young Spanish speaking couple preparing to baptize their son. I was really excited to meet with them because they had just finished marriage preparation the year before, and now it was time to baptize their newborn. Nothing makes my day like seeing one of our newlyweds living their vocation! :)</div>
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Towards the end of our meeting the husband asked me, "I have a question for you, and I hope I don't offend....<i>¿Estás esperando?</i>" It took me an extra second to understand what he said because Esperar = to wait for, to hope for, <a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2013/12/the-season-of-espera.html" target="_blank">and it's actually one of my most favorite Spanish words</a>. </div>
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But then I realized he was asking me THAT question: </div>
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"<b><i>Are you expecting?</i>" </b> </div>
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I laughed and said I didn't know. I told them that my husband and I were really praying about having a baby, and that we'd find out in the next few days if we were pregnant or not. </div>
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What made this man's question extra interesting was that right before our meeting I had spent some time in the adoration chapel <i>specifically </i>praying about our desire to have a baby. In my journal I wrote something like, "Lord, you know the desires of my heart. You know that we've been praying about having a baby and that we are open to becoming parents. No matter what Your will be done, and please help me to be at peace with that."</div>
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So when the man asked <i>" ¿Estás esperando? (Are you expecting)?"</i> I wasn't really as mortified as I would normally have been. His wife shook her head in disbelief that he had <i>actually </i>asked THE FORBIDDEN QUESTION, but we laughed and they said that they really hoped I was pregnant or would be soon. </div>
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When they left I laughed again, wondering if maybe this was God's way of giving me an "Annunciation Moment" or some kind of heads up that maybe our prayers had been answered. </div>
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Fast Forward 2 days: </div>
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Definitely not pregnant. Definitely not laughing.</div>
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Suddenly all the humiliation that I <i>would </i>have felt just days before sank in. <i>Have I gained THAT much weight? I look awful! What sort of cruel joke is this Lord?</i> I cried, I whined, and I pouted. </div>
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At some point during the day the question replayed in my mind: <i><b>Estás esperando?</b> </i>Which literally means: <i><b>Are you waiting for? Are you hoping for?</b> </i></div>
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God reminded me that during adoration<b> </b>I had <i>specifically </i>said <b>"Your will be done."</b> And now I needed to follow up on those words of surrender. The question was not an offensive jab; rather, it was an invitation to trust. <br />
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<i>Deanna, are you waiting for Me? Are you full of hope and trust? </i></div>
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Scripture tells us over and over again to wait for the Lord, to hope in the Lord, and to trust that God's plans are perfect:</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikw3wnTecCfYHriL4H09ztHB3NJiu1y2EyKsNIj0P8JAzhLN_G-MsE6wMwji_K0DdWWjlk7UcuJkWJr_ZczCvSUv70tofY9OswfYyvamjNw00DTd4ylJwp1I7z_UH_DYhsBXL4KzZucLo/s1600/theythatwaitonthelord.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikw3wnTecCfYHriL4H09ztHB3NJiu1y2EyKsNIj0P8JAzhLN_G-MsE6wMwji_K0DdWWjlk7UcuJkWJr_ZczCvSUv70tofY9OswfYyvamjNw00DTd4ylJwp1I7z_UH_DYhsBXL4KzZucLo/s1600/theythatwaitonthelord.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a>"<i>Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; yes, wait for the Lord!" </i>- Psalm 27:14</h2>
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<i></i><i>"I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word I hope; my soul waits for the Lord.</i>" - Psalm 130:5-6</h2>
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And a personal favorite: </div>
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<i>"For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me; when you seek me with all your heart, I will be found by you..." </i>- Jeremiah 29:11-14</h2>
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That's when I realized that it didn't matter if I was praying about getting pregnant, or just praying about doing God's will at home,work, and in the world. <b> God was inviting me to <i>trust </i>in Him, to <i>surrender </i>to Him, to <i>wait </i>for Him. </b></div>
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And so, the next time I was asked <i>"¿Estás esperando?" </i>(which was about a month later) I could smile. Even though I had to answer that I wasn't pregnant, I knew I needed to take a moment to reflect on whether or not I've been waiting, hoping and trusting God the best that I can. </div>
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Today if you were to ask me <i>"¿Estás esperando?" </i>I'd say that I'm working on it, and really trying to surrender a little more of that trust on a daily basis. </div>
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I'd also tell you, "<i>Si...</i>" </div>
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...about the beginning of February 2015.</div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhObrwGFE1s1qfPtGji_tZaJUEW6cAPydgWDRI855RQsfLRA-v0sXt0JsTpQWkwYvG4GWo1G7_BYnr_WB_jWOV5oUE1AYA6h3zMi_0FOfFj1ARrLtj4WnFoYxBoKfz_rpyE8f-zbvkUuKM/s640/blogger-image-1859082014.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhObrwGFE1s1qfPtGji_tZaJUEW6cAPydgWDRI855RQsfLRA-v0sXt0JsTpQWkwYvG4GWo1G7_BYnr_WB_jWOV5oUE1AYA6h3zMi_0FOfFj1ARrLtj4WnFoYxBoKfz_rpyE8f-zbvkUuKM/s320/blogger-image-1859082014.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">P.S. No, we don't know it is a boy. But those shoes were cute :)</td></tr>
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Please pray for us :)</div>
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be at peace<br />walk on water<br />be not afraid</h2>
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<span style="font-size: large;">d*</span></div>
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Jesus en ti confio</h2>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-4946931827503340642014-06-07T14:48:00.000-05:002015-06-18T16:13:01.799-05:00How I Met My Husband {part 2}<div style="text-align: justify;">
<i>This is the story of how God used the internet to not only lead me to my husband, but how this adventure in online dating taught us the beauty of God's perfect timing and God's plan for our lives.</i></div>
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<a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2014/05/howimetmyhusbandpt1.html" target="_blank">You can read {Part One} of our adventure here</a>! </h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0AEwq26E3yHqwJD5HZbcevKbrtjkaVNK1trbqdHXcccIw77O8PgYXi3VlJlbvkAZgEeCrpoHSb5fhel5a4vkfnjmtr9l67uPDQCTC8VLyQcNFXyzWZgkJVCHEag13ci-9uvkK776n0OY/s1600/how+I+met+my+husband-datingpics.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0AEwq26E3yHqwJD5HZbcevKbrtjkaVNK1trbqdHXcccIw77O8PgYXi3VlJlbvkAZgEeCrpoHSb5fhel5a4vkfnjmtr9l67uPDQCTC8VLyQcNFXyzWZgkJVCHEag13ci-9uvkK776n0OY/s1600/how+I+met+my+husband-datingpics.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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{Part Two}</h2>
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I'm sure you can understand the wave of relief that washed over the both of us as we walked towards each other confidently confirming that this was in fact the person we had spent the last six weeks speaking to. </div>
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Michael wasn't a creepy old man and neither was I.</div>
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So far so good.</div>
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We said our excited hellos and hugged each other. I remember it was one of those good bear hugs you get from a dear friend. "Wow, You're real! This is amazing!" he said. </div>
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I think we both needed a moment to get over the shock that this was <i>actually happening</i>. He was here. I was here. And now we got to spend the weekend figuring out what would happen next.</div>
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The original plan was ice cream, but due to a GPS failure we ended up at Starbucks instead. The conversation was just as easy as before, only this time Michael got to witness my goofy smiles in person. At one point Michael said, "The family that is hosting me and Sayf this weekend wanted to make sure that I told them where I was going and who you were, because you know... you could be an axe murderer or something..."</div>
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I laughed and pointed out that the company car I was driving did have space for a body or two in the trunk... but then realized, "Oh. I didn't tell anyone where<i> I</i> was going...." We laughed and agreed that that probably hadn't been my smartest decision of the week...</div>
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<b><span style="color: #20124d;">a kinda sorta really important side note: </span></b></h2>
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<i><span style="color: #351c75;"><b>Don't ever ever ever do that!! I should have told the family I was living with where I was, because in all truth Michael could have been fifty shades of crazy from the darkest reaches of the internet. I was confident he wasn't going to put me in the trunk of my car, but hey.. you can never be too careful, right? So if I can offer any online dating advice just don't do what I did. We laugh about it now, but seriously... what was I thinking?!?! Anyway, back to our story: </b></span></i></div>
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Despite my failure to take the proper precautions, I really appreciated how <i>comfortable </i>I felt around Michael. We stayed at Starbucks until it closed, and then I drove him back to his host family's home and we sat outside and talked some more. </div>
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Towards the end of the evening, Michael asked if he could hold my hand (he had been told about the forced hand holding experience with the other guy I met from CatholicMatch). When my hand rested in his for the first time I remember thinking <span style="font-size: large;"><b>"<i>It fits</i>!"</b></span> I felt safe. I felt like our friendship had the potential to evolve into something very special, and we had the entire weekend to figure that out. </div>
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Now, it would be easy to say that from the moment we laid eyes on each other we knew that <b>this was the ONE</b>, but that just wouldn't be true. As wonderful as our first "date" had been, the next day was a little different. </div>
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It wasn't that Michael wasn't a perfect gentleman on our trips to dinner, the bookstore, and a walk through the park, but something was just <i>different. </i>Perhaps it was his <strike>rant</strike> umm, prolonged and passionate explanation of the evil of shows like <i>American Idol</i>, and how they reflect the lack of values in our society (something else we laugh about now). But by the end of the evening as I drove back home I started wondering if this had been a good idea. </div>
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I remember calling my parents that evening and telling them "I don't know! I just don't know what's going to happen! I mean he's nice but.. but I just don't know!" I think that I was waiting for that moment to <i>know</i>... <span style="font-size: large;">to have that <b><i>AHA! </i></b>moment</span> in which I knew exactly what was going to happen next...and it hadn't happened. Then my Dad gave me some advice that changed the entire weekend for me: </div>
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"Deanna, don't overthink this. Enjoy the moment."</h2>
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I really appreciated my Dad saying that. It could have been just as easy for him to tell me that maybe I shouldn't hang out with Michael, or maybe this wasn't meant to be, but he didn't. <b>Don't overthink this. Enjoy the moment. </b>This wasn't license to do whatever or to not care about the time I was spending with Michael. But it was a solid reminder to <b>be at peace, to have fun, and to put this in God's hands.</b> </div>
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<i><br /></i></div>
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I prayed about it again that night and decided that my Dad was right. Perhaps this was just another opportunity to get out of the boat and trust God with the details. </div>
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I picked Michael up early Saturday morning, and we drove to a park close to the San Antonio Zoo. Since I was still in the middle of the 54-day rosary novena, we decided to pray the rosary together at the start of our day. This was about the time that we made Mary the patroness of our discernment/relationship. </div>
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<span style="text-align: left;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="text-align: left;">And once again, the Blessed Mother must have done her thing because the rest of the day was absolutely wonderful. </span></div>
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<span style="text-align: left;"><br /></span></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgb6l431gluVUECaoe6HJHpSvbl-QiZVXb4WiBujeUzywzf65efVFtnjEqLGNNWXEURRtDfRgEK0kOgi7lRdyIxOIQB1BYhum9oXRQS4vpaOF9NlOo5WvL0cOtFRcEqrc6jB6xTmyDC7uQ/s1600/Matthias+the+Puppy-desk.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgb6l431gluVUECaoe6HJHpSvbl-QiZVXb4WiBujeUzywzf65efVFtnjEqLGNNWXEURRtDfRgEK0kOgi7lRdyIxOIQB1BYhum9oXRQS4vpaOF9NlOo5WvL0cOtFRcEqrc6jB6xTmyDC7uQ/s1600/Matthias+the+Puppy-desk.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Matthias the Mutt, keeping me company at work for 4 yrs</td></tr>
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<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="text-align: left;">We did all sorts of things around town: a museum, lunch, a movie, a ginormous bookstore, ice cream, and even a trip to the toy store. Michael insisted that I needed a buddy for my office, so he bought me a puppy (which remains on my desk to this day). </span></div>
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<br /></div>
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If I could name the <span style="font-size: large;"><b>"aha!" </b></span><b><span style="font-size: large;">moment</span></b> in which I <i>knew </i>I was falling in love with Michael, I would say it was after seeing "Prince of Persia". I had gone to the restroom, texted my Mom something vague like "Oh my goodness Mommmmyy.....*smiley face*" and walked back out to Michael where my hand met his. It was like a moment of clarity. <i>Yes, this is supposed to happen</i>. <br />
<br />
Sunday was just as fun as Saturday, and we spent the entire day together again, which included going to Mass, touring the Alamo, and lots more hand holding. It had been a <b>really good</b> weekend. <br />
<br />
Now the big question was, <i><b>what happens next?</b> </i>We had finally met in person, we enjoyed spending time together, and we knew that this was definitely worth continuing. But now that our weekend had ended we realized that we still had the challenge of long-distance in our discernment. <b> And this really was a <i>discernment</i>.</b> We weren't playing around and this wasn't a summer fling. If we were going to start dating it was because we were discerning the vocation of married life, which meant God needed to play an active role. <br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5PvV3bP0qB4zik2RjeXslnZ-UcNtMjHsMfEljWv1AC_lcmjnX5qJkxwtuDq48FO3_fu7jEpW002jiQkediyzm3PSdIe1BgY4LsesBcLZi4zdRhKRaUMnOh2AGdidtLK5E55pchSuB6i0/s640/blogger-image--966241271.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5PvV3bP0qB4zik2RjeXslnZ-UcNtMjHsMfEljWv1AC_lcmjnX5qJkxwtuDq48FO3_fu7jEpW002jiQkediyzm3PSdIe1BgY4LsesBcLZi4zdRhKRaUMnOh2AGdidtLK5E55pchSuB6i0/s640/blogger-image--966241271.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">July 2010: Making Ice Cream at Casa Johnston</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<br />
And He did. <br />
<br />
Michael and his family invited me up to Henderson for the 4th of July holiday weekend, and on July 2nd Michael and I shared our first kiss and officially became a couple. At the end of July, Michael came back to visit me in San Antonio and he met my family who was visiting from Memphis.<br />
<br />
<br />
By the end of the summer we had officially become a couple and already met the families. So really, things moved much faster than I think we originally thought when those first emails and phone calls were made. <br />
<br />
In the months that followed, I moved to Dodge City for a new job, and Michael got a job in the Diocese of Tyler, TX. We had a long distance relationship for a little over two years, and then Michael moved to Dodge City in November of 2012. <a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2013/04/still-thinking-bout-easter-vigil.html" target="_blank">We were engaged after the Easter Vigil Mass </a>in 2013, <a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2013/11/7-quick-takes-2-wedding-pope-hand.html" target="_blank">got married October 5, 2013</a>. <br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgiyhYJKMHV4phw-fwTPmJ0VdHkvkmhN2vDsjTApDYwxlo7t6LY-M0OQB9IXujMcvUyQuExRP9baTcJTS96c5Bm_RWzUVpgIfawqE9i1hUR8qeAO3Ifajjk3F9rW_GY0D5BFO3nMOOU62Ge/s640/blogger-image--1689546568.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgiyhYJKMHV4phw-fwTPmJ0VdHkvkmhN2vDsjTApDYwxlo7t6LY-M0OQB9IXujMcvUyQuExRP9baTcJTS96c5Bm_RWzUVpgIfawqE9i1hUR8qeAO3Ifajjk3F9rW_GY0D5BFO3nMOOU62Ge/s320/blogger-image--1689546568.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
And I can't help but see how God's hand was part of every single detail. <br />
<br />
When I look back on how God led us to one another I can't help but admit how <i>perfect</i> God's timing was. <b>Michael and I didn't meet each other a moment too soon, or a moment too late</b>. While my teens and early twenties may have had phases of frustration that I wasn't dating, or worrying that God was the only one who would ever love me, I can look at my journey and see how God was just preparing me for my husband.<br />
<br />
Sure, I had to wait 24 years for my first date, my first boyfriend, and my first kiss. <br />
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<br />
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But it was totally, 100% worth the wait.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAGjBQSx9LOMdZFTtOcyG98z5bOIVWQBeoMZIUqZ3qielGZnllRfqQoSkGBYnQ7Fg5fJCg1Ds4kNSis_pfOOvxun6Kzjx1Gocq5fep9_dr8Em8GXYSR82WNY2nAsw9zTnhyl1ST0cZA1s/s1600/i+found+him.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="391" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAGjBQSx9LOMdZFTtOcyG98z5bOIVWQBeoMZIUqZ3qielGZnllRfqQoSkGBYnQ7Fg5fJCg1Ds4kNSis_pfOOvxun6Kzjx1Gocq5fep9_dr8Em8GXYSR82WNY2nAsw9zTnhyl1ST0cZA1s/s1600/i+found+him.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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be at peace<br />
walk on water<br />
be not afraid<br />
<br />
d*</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-43099368794858056522014-05-30T18:06:00.000-05:002015-06-18T16:12:14.655-05:00How I Met My Husband {part one}<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: justify;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><div style="text-align: center;">
<i>This is the story of how God used the internet (among other things) to teach me to trust in His perfect timing and perfect plan for my life.... and also why online dating no longer gives me the creeps. </i></div>
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<br /></div>
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZalRyTTD4tdqdtpAH29Ye7uVR98OAs_rIdcevpe9Aw0BGSEkJlEQZkeQqoxEfq1bEl4KMZWk9XNT7Rb56kq8lPmG8abl_JBI245Pa-MzogTAVG2wRlvOfWMoD6n9k0AcR3qCokOf-ojQ/s1600/how+I+met+my+husband-watermark.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZalRyTTD4tdqdtpAH29Ye7uVR98OAs_rIdcevpe9Aw0BGSEkJlEQZkeQqoxEfq1bEl4KMZWk9XNT7Rb56kq8lPmG8abl_JBI245Pa-MzogTAVG2wRlvOfWMoD6n9k0AcR3qCokOf-ojQ/s1600/how+I+met+my+husband-watermark.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Photo by Tindall Farmer </td></tr>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;">I had always
imagined myself meeting my husband the “traditional” way. And by traditional I mean the way it happens
in all the good movies: a coffee shop,
the bookstore, the park…Or maybe I’d meet a good Catholic man at Mass or a
conference or something. These were all
of the “normal” ways I figured I’d meet THE ONE, and we’d add our story to the
adorable list of romantic comedies. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;">Online
dating? Never. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;">Meet someone
on the <i>internet</i>? Heck no! Looking to the World Wide Web seemed like an
act of desperation… only for folks who had completely given up hope of finding
their soul mate and resolved to “settling” for an online match. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;">But you know
what they say… The best way to make God laugh is to tell Him your
plans or give Him a list of <b>“</b><i>Never Will I Evers…</i><b>”</b></span></div>
<h2 style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: large;">Let’s rewind
to 2010</span><span style="font-size: 12pt; font-weight: normal;">.</span></span></span></h2>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;">I was 24, living in San Antonio, and
<b>I had never dated.</b> This
was not by my own choice, and it was f r u s t r a t i n g. Sure, there had been the creepy guys at gas
stations who would occasionally offer their best “Hey baby, what’s your
name?” But no one expressed any serious
sort of interest. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222; font-size: 12pt;">Where are all
the good Catholic men? </span><span style="color: #222222; font-size: 12pt;">Is there
something <b><i>wrong with me</i></b>?</span></span></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<div style="text-align: center;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;">Sure, I knew
that God was really the only One I needed. </span><br />
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12pt;">And yes,
Jesus is the best spouse a gal could ask for.</span></div>
</div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;">I had
wrestled with the vocation to religious life for a long time, and the desire
for marriage and family just got bigger. There seemed to be this constant war between <b>“God
you’re the only One I need!”</b> & <b>“GOD, are you the ONLY ONE who will
love me?”</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">What I </span>didn't<span style="font-size: small;"> realize at the time was that God was writing a better story than I ever
could have imagined. And it would happen
in a way that I least expected. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;">In February
2010 I decided I would attend the </span><span style="font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;"><a href="http://www.nationalcatholicsingles.com/">National Catholic Singles
Conference</a> in San Antonio.</span><span style="color: #222222; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;"> It was a
BLAST! Not only did I get more exposure
to the Theology of the Body, but it was like God was helping me to find the joy
and peace of being single. He was working on my heart and a lot of healing was taking place. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;">One of the presentations was by Brian Barcaro, the co-founder of
<b>CatholicMatch.com.</b> He talked a little
bit about the Catholic dating site, the benefits of online dating, and
encouraged us to just give it a try. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;">Fine. Maybe online dating wasn't so creepy/crazy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;">By
this point in time I had a friend who had met her husband on another Catholic
dating site. They were normal. They certainly weren’t “settling”. And it was obvious God was part of their love
story. So maybe, just <i>maaaaaybe</i>
I’d give it a try. But not yet.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #222222; font-size: 12.0pt; line-height: 115%; mso-ansi-language: EN-US; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-US; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;">Over the next month some things happened that, well, let's just say that peace and contentment with being single was long gone. Long story short, I had hit my limit, and I was frustrated with God. </span></span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<b><span style="color: #222222; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">“OK GOD…if
you’re not going to send anyone to me, I’m going to take matters into MY OWN
HANDS.”</span><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_qKdJOMosE1UhGEFDlWKJkTVxfdfVlAEsN2FNxrki9v6j96OR1Rwbl4TzgvAruJNQSgbbOq18KXwdSeys5-zzg18452y6mM4MNP6SfHgEf_gFBESwBSPTkDAVxpW_o7vOI3c-rIEsFhA/s1600/catholic+match+profile-deanna.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_qKdJOMosE1UhGEFDlWKJkTVxfdfVlAEsN2FNxrki9v6j96OR1Rwbl4TzgvAruJNQSgbbOq18KXwdSeys5-zzg18452y6mM4MNP6SfHgEf_gFBESwBSPTkDAVxpW_o7vOI3c-rIEsFhA/s1600/catholic+match+profile-deanna.jpg" width="159" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Defiant Deanna's <br />
Catholic Match Profile Picture.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<span style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">And
convinced that God just </span>wasn't</span><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"> going to help me in the dating department, I signed up for CatholicMatch.com and paid for a two month membership.</span><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;">So there I
was… Defiant Deanna with her CM profile. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222; font-size: 12pt;"><span style="background-color: white;">Two or three weeks into my members</span><span style="background-color: white;">hip <span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">I was in contact with a few guys from the area. </span>In</span><span style="background-color: white;"> fact, one of them took me out on a
lunch date followed by a walk in the park… but then he forced me to
hold his hand </span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 16px;">(really) </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12pt;">and rattled off all the names of his future children…and </span><i style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12pt;">somehow</i><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: 12pt;">
I knew it wasn't meant to be. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222; font-size: small;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #222222;">By the beginning of April I was back to being skeptical about this online dating thing. Sure, it had connected me with a few guys in my area. It had even provided an entertaining and awkward date. But this really didn't seem like it was going anywhere. I decided that once my subscription ran out, I wouldn't renew it. Why did I think I could try to do this without God’s help? I didn't realize it at the time, but <b>God was doing more heart and soul surgery on me</b>. I may have thought I was "gonna show Him," but really God was leading me into something deeper and more perfect.</span><br />
<span style="color: #222222;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #222222;">Because He's just good like that.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;">On April 16<sup>th</sup>
I “cast the net wide” one last time before the subscription ran out. I did another search, and sent a couple of “Hi, how are you? This isn’t
awkward at all!” type messages. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;">Before
logging off I noticed the “Welcome to Our New Members!” box.</span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;"> </span></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
</div>
<h2 style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">And there he
was. </span></span></h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDE3pkUDsqGZJrojEOQEaADAAIS196ueR3-3XllZwOc2Vj7vs0-CEQqRtBHCKn2LCj0UVnNYBN4LujnhPkE-T0NmA2JujI1-_VMvtRCNXo2WleGfdwunhqgL_nfqvZciXGfzpQOHDltXg/s1600/Catholic+Match+Profile-Michael.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="background-color: transparent; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: justify;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDE3pkUDsqGZJrojEOQEaADAAIS196ueR3-3XllZwOc2Vj7vs0-CEQqRtBHCKn2LCj0UVnNYBN4LujnhPkE-T0NmA2JujI1-_VMvtRCNXo2WleGfdwunhqgL_nfqvZciXGfzpQOHDltXg/s1600/Catholic+Match+Profile-Michael.jpg" width="241" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;">He had a really
nice smile and the baby leopard was a nice touch. According to his profile he was a lover of </span><a href="http://www.promisedlanddairy.com/" target="_blank">Promised Land chocolate milk</a> (and chocolate in general)<span style="color: #222222; font-size: small;"> and Haribo gummy bears (the specificity of </span><i style="color: #222222;">Haribo</i><span style="color: #222222; font-size: small;"> was important. There are no other true gummies). </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222; font-size: 12pt;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: #222222; font-size: 12pt;">I
decided I would send him a message, which simply said something like: </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 12.0pt; mso-ascii-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-bidi-language: HE; mso-bidi-theme-font: major-bidi; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-hansi-theme-font: major-bidi;"><br /></span></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirQrnQ970XPWz84IunDuNXz5iT5seEMhJBk2chOrnCbYgELbWhyphenhyphen_7Mq8Ga9794gUTGEnnoFZ3g6dP3pfFE8jRo1jzhf26iDXhkRT6HZx-NGcjOyE2YoEUhT6rpcf7veScl8u8xSdQ55Kc/s1600/First+Email+to+Michael.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirQrnQ970XPWz84IunDuNXz5iT5seEMhJBk2chOrnCbYgELbWhyphenhyphen_7Mq8Ga9794gUTGEnnoFZ3g6dP3pfFE8jRo1jzhf26iDXhkRT6HZx-NGcjOyE2YoEUhT6rpcf7veScl8u8xSdQ55Kc/s1600/First+Email+to+Michael.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Note: Never underestimate the power of a smiley face<span style="color: #222222; font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif; font-size: 12pt;"> </span><span style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: Wingdings;">:)</span></span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">To be honest, I didn't expect a reply. I can't even tell you for sure why I sent him the message. I certainly didn't think that this email would be the beginning of something </span>life-changing. But God did. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br /></span></span>
</span><br />
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">Within a day or so, Michael actually responded. Before I knew it we were instant messaging and emailing almost every single day. </span><span style="font-size: small;"> I think what stood out the most over those first few emails and online conversations was Michael's ability to make me laugh, and the sincerity in which he said he would pray for me. </span></span></div>
</div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">On May 4<sup>th</sup>
he finally asked for my phone number, and we talked for the first time. I don’t remember what we said that first
night, but I do remember smiling and laughing a lot. The conversation was natural. Phone conversations became the new daily
ritual, lasting anywhere from 1-4 hours. </span> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;"><b><br /></b></span>
</span><br />
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><b>Stuff was getting real.</b> </span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">By this
point, Michael and I were becoming fast friends, and we started thinking about <i>where
do we go from here? </i>We figured we
would eventually need to meet in person, maybe later in the summer, and we
could see where things would go. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">I should
mention that one of the things we love most about our experience with
online dating is that it really helped us to develop a </span><i>friendship</i><span style="font-size: small;"> before
anything else. Even if this didn't turn into a romantic relationship, we had talked so much that we knew we would at least be very good friends. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;">It also
forced us to <b>pray about this relationship</b>.
A lot. </span><span style="color: #222222;">So that’s
what we did. I started the </span><a href="http://www.patheos.com/blogs/godandthemachine/2013/08/the-54-day-rosary-novena/">54 day rosary novena</a><span style="color: #222222;">, asking the
Blessed Mother to help us discern our relationship, and prayed that God could help
us meet in person sooner than later. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">Towards the
end of May, Michael told me that his seminarian friend, Sayf, (the man who would eventually celebrate our Nuptial Mass) agreed to drive him to San Antonio
the first weekend of June. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0.0001pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit; line-height: 115%;">The
Blessed Mother is fast. :)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span>
</span><br />
<span style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 18.399999618530273px;">Friday, June 4th was going to be the big day. Michael and Sayf would be in town until Monday morning, giving Michael and I the weekend to get to know one another. As the day got closer, I got more nervous and excited, and prayed that this would be exactly what God wanted it to be. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;"><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;"><br /></span></span></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;"><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;">Thursday evening, however, I got a bit of a surprise. I was walking out of my evening Zumba class, covered in sweat when Michael texted me. He said that they had gotten into town earlier and wanted to know how I felt about meeting <b>that night..in oh, an hour or so. </b></span></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #222222;"><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;"><b><br /></b></span></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;"><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;">I don't think I've ever driven home, showered, dressed, and done make-up that fast in my life.</span></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #222222;"><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;"><br /></span></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;"><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;">I got the address to where Michael was staying, and headed out... but before picking him up I stopped by perpetual adoration and prayed. I didn't know what was going to happen, but I really just wanted God's will to be done... I prayed the rosary on the drive over to pick up Michael, and with nervous excitement I pulled up to the house.</span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;"><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;"><br /></span></span></span>
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;">"</span></span><span style="color: #222222;"><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;">OK</span></span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;"> Lord, Your will be done."</span></span></i></div>
<span style="color: #222222;"><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;"><i><br /></i></span></span><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="color: #222222;"><span style="line-height: 18.399999618530273px;">A handsome young man in jeans and a black T-shirt came out of the house. I got out of my car, and with a smile and a crazy bunch of butterflies in my stomach, walked towards the man I'd met on online.</span></span></span><br />
<br />
<br />
<h2 style="text-align: center;">
<a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2014/06/howimetmyhusbandpt2.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #222222; font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: x-large;"><span style="line-height: 18.4px;"><i>To be continued...</i></span></span></a></h2>
</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-17281219200001294202014-05-09T12:01:00.001-05:002014-05-09T14:46:15.635-05:00Seven Quick Takes (#10): Life After Grad School<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.conversiondiary.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/7_quick_takes_sm1.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1387" src="http://www.conversiondiary.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/7_quick_takes_sm1.jpg" height="195" title="7_quick_takes_sm" width="290" /></a></div>
<h2 style="text-align: center;">
It is finished!</h2>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small; font-weight: normal;">After submitting our thesis projects last weekend (which equaled a combined total of 54,000 words/171 pages). My husband and I are happy to report that we are done with our graduate theology program! </span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh__TssDxqQEkeE_wMFNcgPvTdGqEdGIBORROhTGV7ZuX8rW-lEmEPlbgEKyOWJJVB-3gBjcsVF_Kp-fvJOm2Gy0gjuRBu5XJxfYUhm31WYxVQ77-TzTukccpddTOAvzDrLUy3iS-u3CWE/s1600/Thesis+projects.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh__TssDxqQEkeE_wMFNcgPvTdGqEdGIBORROhTGV7ZuX8rW-lEmEPlbgEKyOWJJVB-3gBjcsVF_Kp-fvJOm2Gy0gjuRBu5XJxfYUhm31WYxVQ77-TzTukccpddTOAvzDrLUy3iS-u3CWE/s1600/Thesis+projects.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small; font-weight: normal;"><br /></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small; font-weight: normal;">Here are #7QT on all of the grand plans I have for life after grad school...</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>
</i></div>
<div style="font-size: 130%; text-align: center;">
<h2>
<b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt1" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 1 ---</a><br />Unpack. Finally.</b></h2>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="qt1"></a></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Right about the time we moved was the same time that thesis writing kicked into high gear, which means we have spent the last couple of months with boxes e v e r y w h e r e. Praise God for basements, but seriously, it's time to make this home sweet home. I have these grand plans for wine and cheese nights, summer BBQs, and NERF wars at Casa Johnston...<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
And trust me, there are going to be some pretty epic NERF battles in our future...</div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSMtBBIEldhpZgJtUHXSkvB6-bGoKMqLN377SuaMZwVOS7crOibahuIov0pkijG9ZtiB0pFCHNuLcuf_i7oyviTW53mphNQ3hYwfi6gWrnEtiVeONqMoPwoDQ9y0tbUH5LWQ23a34gwuFq/s1600/nerf+gun.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSMtBBIEldhpZgJtUHXSkvB6-bGoKMqLN377SuaMZwVOS7crOibahuIov0pkijG9ZtiB0pFCHNuLcuf_i7oyviTW53mphNQ3hYwfi6gWrnEtiVeONqMoPwoDQ9y0tbUH5LWQ23a34gwuFq/s1600/nerf+gun.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Stuff just got real.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
</div>
<div style="font-size: 130%; text-align: center;">
<h2>
<b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt2" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 2 ---</a><br />Summer Reading</b></h2>
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="qt2"></a></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
The last thing I thought I would want to do after writing this paper was read. But these are two books that I am super excited about: <i><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Something-Other-Than-God-Passionately/dp/1586178822/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1399133450&sr=8-1&keywords=something+other+than+god" target="_blank">Something Other Than God</a> </i>by Jennifer Fulwiler (host of #7QT at www.conversiondiary.com!) and <i><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Sinners-Guide-Natural-Family-Planning/dp/1612787878/ref=pd_bxgy_b_img_y" target="_blank">The Sinner's Guide to Natural Family Planning</a> </i>by Simcha Fisher (<a href="http://www.patheos.com/blogs/simchafisher/" target="_blank">blogger at Patheos and the NCR</a>). </div>
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I love these ladies, and they both remind me that when you decide to follow Christ there are bound to be some pretty frustrating yet hilarious challenges. </div>
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<b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt3" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 3 ---</a><br />Green Thumb? Probably Not.</b></h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhf5_0mxlOKrjIcrvPwuOOdEvONqpZjk_jFHknM9GX5WnI1o_oiAbVMBkJUKqtnAeBwB3ud5OKa1Fcqm7h7lHqwxHz8bYDPAsSzFOiH09UmIzQFQM46m57-d-TSwf2zfTKI2pqfRHQcx00/s1600/backyard1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhf5_0mxlOKrjIcrvPwuOOdEvONqpZjk_jFHknM9GX5WnI1o_oiAbVMBkJUKqtnAeBwB3ud5OKa1Fcqm7h7lHqwxHz8bYDPAsSzFOiH09UmIzQFQM46m57-d-TSwf2zfTKI2pqfRHQcx00/s1600/backyard1.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
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I've never been one to really enjoy working in the yard, but now that we are renting a home that actually has greenery to care for I'm willing to give it a shot. My husband knows exactly what he <i>wants </i>to do, so I'll at least be there for moral support :) At the very least I'm bound to get a least a little sun this summer, and that's not a bad thing!</div>
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<b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt4" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 4 ---</a><br />Wedding Pictures</b></h2>
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We've been married 7 months and I still haven't had wedding pictures printed and framed! I'm looking forward to making some photo books via Shutterfly and also picking out some favorites for the walls. Any advice for picture framing and decorating? It seems like there is an art to putting the right picture with the right frame, but I'm clueless. I'll be consulting the great wisdom of Pinterest, but if you have suggestions I'm all ears. Arts/Crafts/Decor are not my forte.</div>
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<b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt5" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 5 ---</a><br />Sharing Our Story</b></h2>
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I'm really looking forward to updating and redesigning this blog. For some reason I image I'll have all of this free time now that school is over (ha!) One of the stories I'd like to share is <b>How I Met My Husband. </b>We're coming up on the 4th anniversary of the day we met and when we started dating, and it's a story I'd like to get down in writing. Let's just say God has a very good sense of humor...and you should never say never. </div>
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<b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt6" style="color: black; font-size: 130%; text-decoration: none;">--- 6 ---</a></b></h2>
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<b>Summer Adventures</b></h2>
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<span style="text-align: justify;">It looks like we'll be traveling at least once a month over the summer. We've got a wedding in the Seattle, WA area in June, I'll be heading to Philadelphia in July for the TOB Congress, another wedding in August in Texas, and then my 10 year class reunion is in Memphis sometime in September. Sheesh, by that point it will almost be our one year anniversary. Time sure is flying...</span></div>
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<b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt7" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 7 ---</a></b></h2>
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<b style="font-size: 31px;">Spiritual Growth</b></h2>
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I'll be honest, most of my Lent involved just trying to survive the overwhelming task of research and writing. Lenten "spiritual growth spurt"... not so much. At the same time, I did learn that there's nothing too small (or too big) to take to the foot of the Cross. Maybe that was the one lesson I needed to learn this Lent. I'd like to think that studying theology the last 3 years was more than just an academic accomplishment, and actually helped me draw closer to Christ. But this is not an automatic thing. It takes work. Saints aren't saints because they had theology degrees. The saints followed Christ and trusted Him with everything. I want to do that.<br />
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Of course, these are all of the things that <i>I think</i> are going to happen now that grad school is over, but at the end of the day what I'm most looking forward to is seeing what adventures God leads us on! Life out of the boat is usually never dull! </div>
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For more Quick Takes, visit <a href="http://www.conversiondiary.com/">Conversion Diary!</a></h3>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-22059972971788189722014-04-20T22:11:00.001-05:002014-04-20T22:13:00.145-05:00Infertility Awareness Week, 2014: A Catholic Perspective <div class="MsoNormal">
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One of the great things about working in marriage and family life ministry is the ability share the beauty of <i>life-giving love</i> and how openness to life is an important part of the Sacrament of Marriage. But over the years I have also learned the importance of being sensitive to and praying for those who carry the<b> cross of infertility</b>. While it is important to encourage couples to be open to life and to see children as a blessing, we also have to remember that there are those who are <i>very</i> open to life and would love nothing more than to be able to achieve pregnancy, but for one reason or another cannot. </div>
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<b>April 20-26, 2014 is National Infertility Awareness Week. </b> </div>
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My friend Rebecca from <a href="http://www.theroadhomewv.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">The Road Home</a> asked me to share this post from a group of Catholic women who have experienced infertility. In this heartfelt and personal message these women share helpful resources as well as ways that you can support a family member or friend who might be struggling with infertility issues. </div>
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Even if you yourself are not struggling with infertility, or do not know of anyone who is, please read and share this message, and pray for those who are experiencing this cross. </div>
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<span style="font-weight: normal;"><i><span style="text-indent: -24px;">"</span><span style="text-indent: -24px;">Do not pity us. Yes, we have much sorrow. Yes, we struggle. But, we place our faith in God, lean on the grace of our marriage, and trust that someday, whether here on earth or in heaven, we will see and understand God’s plan.</span><span style="text-indent: -24px;">"</span></i></span></div>
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<b>Infertility Awareness Week, 2014: </b></h2>
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<b>A Catholic Perspective </b></h2>
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One in six couples will experience infertility at some point in
their marriage. Infertility is medically defined as the inability to conceive
after 12 cycles of “unprotected” intercourse or 6 cycles using
“fertility-focused” intercourse. A couple who has never conceived has “primary
infertility” and a couple who has conceived in the past but is unable to again
has “secondary infertility”. Many couples who experience infertility have also
experienced miscarriage or pregnancy loss.</div>
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<b>
This week, April 20 – 26, 2014 is National Infertility Awareness
Week.</b></div>
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We, a group of Catholic women who have experienced infertility,
would like to take a moment to share with you what the experience of
infertility is like, share ways that you can be of support to a family member
or friend, and share resources that are helpful.<o:p></o:p></div>
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If you are experiencing infertility, please know <b>you are not alone</b>. You are loved and prayed for and there are resources to help you
with the spiritual, emotional, and medical aspects of this journey.... <o:p></o:p></div>
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<b>The Experience of Infertility</b><o:p></o:p></div>
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In the beginning of trying to conceive a child, there is much hope
and anticipation; for some, even a small fear of “what if we get pregnant right
away?” There is planning of how to tell your husband and when you’d announce to
the rest of the family. It is a joyful time that for most couples results in a
positive pregnancy test within the first few months. <b>However, for one in six couples, the months go by without a positive
test and the fears and doubts begin to creep in.</b> At the 6th month of trying
using fertility-focused intercourse (using Natural Family Planning), the couple
knows something is wrong and is considered “infertile” by doctors who
understand the charting of a woman’s pattern of fertility.<b> </b> At the 9th month of trying, the month that, had they conceived
that first month, a baby would have been arriving, is often the most painful of
the early milestones. At the 12th month mark the couple “earns” the label from
the mainstream medical community as “infertile”.<o:p></o:p></div>
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As the months go by, the hopes and <b>dreams are replaced with fears,</b> doubts, and the most invasive doctors’
appointments possible. As a Catholic couple faithful to the teachings of the
Church, we are presented by secular doctors with options that are not options
for us and are told things like “you’ll never have children” and “you have unexplained
infertility”; by our Catholic doctors we are told to keep praying and to have
hope as they roll up their sleeves and work hard to figure out the cause of our
infertility, with each visit asking, <b>“How
are you and your husband doing with all of this?”</b><o:p></o:p></div>
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We find it hard to fit in. We have faith and values that are
different than our secular culture, but our childlessness (primary infertility)
or small family (secondary infertility) makes us blend in with the
norm. We have faith and values that are in line with the teachings of our
Church, but our daily life looks so much different than the others who share
those values and that makes us stand out in a way that we would rather not. We
are Catholic husbands and wives living out our vocation fully. <b>Our openness to life does not come in
the form of children; it takes on the form of a quiet “no” or “not yet” or
“maybe never” from God each month as we slowly trod along.</b> Our openness to
and respect for life courageously resists the temptations presented to us by
the secular artificial reproductive technology industry.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Often times our friends and family do not know what to say to us,
and so they choose to not say anything. <b>Our
infertility stands like a great big elephant in the room that separates us from
others. </b>Most of the time, we don’t want to talk about it, especially not in
public or in group settings because it is painful and we will often shed tears.
We realize it is difficult and ask that you realize this difficulty as well. We
will do our best to be patient and to explain our situation to those who
genuinely would like to know, but please respect our privacy and the boundaries
we establish, as not only is infertility painful, it is also very personal.<o:p></o:p></div>
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One of the hardest experiences of infertility is that it is
cyclical. Each month we get our hopes up as we try; we know what our due date
would be as soon as we ovulate; we know how we would share the news with our
husband and when and how we would tell our parents. We spend two weeks walking <b>a fine line between hope and realism,
between dreaming and despairing</b>. When our next cycle begins – with cramps
and bleeding and tears – we often only have a day or two before we must begin
taking the medications that are meant to help us conceive. There is little to
no time to mourn the dream that is once again not achievable; no time to truly
allow ourselves to heal from one disappointment before we must begin hoping and
trying again. We do not get to pick what days our hormones will plummet or how
the medications we are often taking will affect us. We do not get to pick the
day that would be “best” for us for our next cycle to start. <b>We are at the mercy of hope, and while that
hope keeps us going it is also what leaves us in tears when it is not realized.<o:p></o:p></b></div>
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Our faith is tested. We ask God “why?”, we yell at Him; we draw
closer to God and we push Him away. Mass brings us to tears more often than not
and the season of Advent brings us to our knees. The chorus of “Happy Mother’s
Day” that surrounds us at Mass on the second Sunday in May will be almost more
devastating than the blessing of mothers itself. <b>We know that the Lord is trustworthy and that we can trust in Him</b>;
sometimes it is just a bigger task than we can achieve on our own.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<b>Please…</b><o:p></o:p><br />
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span dir="LTR"></span><b>Pray for us.</b> Truly, it is the best thing that
anyone can do.</div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span dir="LTR"></span>Do not make assumptions about anything - not the size of a family
or whether or not a couple knows what is morally acceptable to the Church. Most
couples who experience infertility do so in silence and these assumptions only
add to the pain. If you are genuinely interested, and not merely curious, begin
a genuine friendship and discover the truth over time.</div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span dir="LTR"></span>Do not offer advice such as “just relax," “you should
adopt," “try this medical option or that medical option” – or really give
any advice. <b>Infertility is a symptom of
an underlying medical problem; a medical problem that often involves
complicated and invasive treatment to cure.</b><o:p></o:p><br />
<b><br /></b></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span dir="LTR"></span>Do not assume that we will adopt. Adoption is a call and should be
discerned by every married couple. Infertility does not automatically mean that
a couple is meant to adopt.</div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span dir="LTR"></span>Ask how we are doing and be willing to hear and be present for the
“real” answer. Often times we answer, “OK” because that’s the easy, “safe”
answer. Let us know that you are willing to walk through this the tough time
with us. <b>Frequently we just need someone
who is willing to listen </b>and give us a hug and let us know we are loved.</div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span dir="LTR"></span>Offer a Mass for us or give us a prayer card or medal to let us
know you are praying for us. Just please refrain from telling us how we must
pray this novena or ask for that saint’s intercession. Most likely we’ve prayed
it and ask for the intercession daily. Please feel free to pray novenas and ask
for intercession on our behalf.</div>
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<o:p></o:p></div>
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<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span dir="LTR"></span>Be tolerant and patient. The medications we take can leave us at
less than our best; we may not have the energy or ability to do much. Please
also respect us when we say "no, thank you" to food or drinks. We may
have restricted diets due to our medical conditions and/or medications.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 20.6pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-line-height-alt: 8.35pt; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-indent: -.25in;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span dir="LTR"></span><b>Share the good news of your pregnancy
privately</b> (preferably in an
email or card or letter and not via text, IM chat, phone call or in person) and
as soon as possible. Please understand that we are truly filled with joy for
you; any sadness we feel is because we have been reminded of our own pain and
we often feel horrible guilt over it as well. Please be patient and kind if we
don’t respond immediately, attend your baby shower or don’t “Like” all of your
Facebook updates about your children. Again, <b>it is really about us, not you</b>.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 20.6pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-line-height-alt: 8.35pt; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-indent: -.25in;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span dir="LTR"></span>Help steer group conversations away from pregnancy and parenting
topics when we are around. We like to be able to interact in a conversation to
which we can contribute meaningfully.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 20.6pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-line-height-alt: 8.35pt; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-indent: -.25in;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span dir="LTR"></span>Do not ask when we are going to “start a family” (we started one
the day we got married).</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 20.6pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-line-height-alt: 8.35pt; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-indent: -.25in;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span dir="LTR"></span>Do not ask which one of us is the “problem” – <b>we are either fertile or infertile as a couple.</b><o:p></o:p><br />
<b><br /></b></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin-left: 20.6pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-line-height-alt: 8.35pt; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-indent: -.25in;">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><span dir="LTR"></span>Do not say things like "I know you'll be parents some
day," or "It will happen, I know it will!" Along the same lines,
please do not tell us stories of a couple you know who struggled for years and
went on to conceive or to "just adopt and then you'll get pregnant"
(this one actually only happens a small percentage of the time). Only God knows
what our future holds, please pray with us that we are able to graciously
accept His will for our lives.</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin-left: 20.6pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-line-height-alt: 8.35pt; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-indent: -.25in;">
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt;">
</span></span><span dir="LTR"></span><b>Do not pity us. Yes, we have much
sorrow. Yes, we struggle. But, we place our faith in God, lean on the grace of
our marriage, and trust that someday, whether here on earth or in heaven, we
will see and understand God’s plan.</b></div>
<!--[if !supportLists]--><b></b><br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<b><br /></b></div>
<b>
<o:p></o:p></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<b>Resources:</b><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="https://www.avemariapress.com/product/1-59471-289-1/The-Infertility-Companion-for-Catholics/">Infertility Companion for Catholics</a><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="http://store.pauline.org/english/books/productid/3872.aspx">Facing Infertility: A Catholic Approach</a><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="http://www.usccb.org/issues-and-action/marriage-and-family/natural-family-planning/resources/upload/Reproductive-Technology-Evaluation-Treatment-of-Infertility-Guidelines-for-Catholic-Couples.pdf">Reproductive Technology: Guidelines for
Catholic Couples (From the USCCB)</a><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Bloggers who contributed to this article (those with an * have
children after primary infertility or are experiencing secondary infertility.
They are marked as such so that if you aren’t up for possibly seeing baby/child
pictures today, you can meet them on a day when you are, but please do take the
time to go and visit them.):<o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="http://thiscrossiembrace.com/">Amy @ This Cross I Embrace</a></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="http://alittlesnapshot.blogspot.com/">DM & AM @ Snapshots</a></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="http://luckyassunshine.blogspot.com/">K @ Lucky as Sunshine</a></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="http://infertileminnesota.blogspot.com/">L @ Infertile in Minnesota</a></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="http://aboundingloveva.blogspot.com/">Lora
@ Abounding Love</a></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="http://graceofadoption.blogspot.com/">Mary Beth @ Grace of Adoption</a> </div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="http://cjfitz.blogspot.com/">Mrs.
Fitz @ Romans 12:12</a><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="http://tellhimyourplans.blogspot.com/">Polkadot
@ Making God Laugh</a><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="http://www.theroadhomewv.blogspot.com/">Rebecca
@ The Road Home</a><o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="http://blessedtobeblog.blogspot.com/">Stephanie @ Blessed to Be</a></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="http://iledif.blogspot.com/">Stephanie
@ Chateau d’IF</a></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="http://allinhisperfecttiming.blogspot.com/">*A. @ All in His Perfect
Timing</a></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
*<a href="http://matchingmoonheads.wordpress.com/">Alison @ Matching Moonheads </a></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="http://findingjoyalongtheway.blogspot.com/">E. @ God’s Plan is My Joy</a></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="http://allthingsjjh.blogspot.com/">*Jenny @ All Things</a></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
*<a href="http://justthinkoflovelythings.blogspot.com/">Katie @ Just Think of Lovely Things</a></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
*<a href="http://joybeyondthecross.blogspot.com/">M. @ Joy Beyond the Cross</a></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
*<a href="http://therobbins-lifeasweknowit.blogspot.com/">Morgan @ Life as We Know
It</a></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<a href="http://fumblingtowardgrace.com/">*Sarah @ Fumbling Toward Grace</a></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
There is also a “Secret” Facebook group with over 150 members who
contributed to this article as well. For more information or to join the group,
email Rebecca at RebeccaWVU02@gmail.com.<o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-86987638980635786462014-04-11T08:00:00.000-05:002014-04-11T09:31:29.567-05:007QT #9 On the First 6 Months of Marriage<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.conversiondiary.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/7_quick_takes_sm1.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1387" src="http://www.conversiondiary.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/7_quick_takes_sm1.jpg" height="195" title="7_quick_takes_sm" width="290" /></a></div>
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
As of April 5th we've been married for <b>SIX MONTHS! </b>Time flies by when you're having fun (and trying to make a thesis deadline...). So here's #7QT on the first 6 months of married life :)</div>
<div style="font-size: 130%; text-align: center;">
<b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt1" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 1 ---</a></b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b>NFP ain't no daisies and roses all the time </b><br />
<b>but it sure is awesome.</b><br />
<b><br /></b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUk92m5SrhwwASRcMjZE9vWQ4doIijf0ZoTMGPe329KrVO_gi7deJ5yKZzNfX2RVSEC6NstdIZqB3p7zvYoTd9ATRvVWIQcr2rsh8P2HbjCFj9iV72rMT5Cwp1Xg9cHI3SeR-EMCVhC8w/s1600/WM-We-NFPmen1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUk92m5SrhwwASRcMjZE9vWQ4doIijf0ZoTMGPe329KrVO_gi7deJ5yKZzNfX2RVSEC6NstdIZqB3p7zvYoTd9ATRvVWIQcr2rsh8P2HbjCFj9iV72rMT5Cwp1Xg9cHI3SeR-EMCVhC8w/s1600/WM-We-NFPmen1.jpg" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
I have mentioned before that I've been teaching Theology of the Body and promoting Natural Family Planning for the past three years, but it's like a whole new ball game now that we are <b>living it. </b>Call it "street cred", call it "life experience", but being able to share our journey with others <b>while also continuing to learn</b> has been incredible. We started teaching NFP together back in January, and it is awesome to not only share the science of NFP, but also witness how it strengthens our marriage. Plus, let's face it: NFP can be challenging sometimes. And once we start having little baby Johnstons running around, I'm sure our challenges with NFP will be different than they are right now. But at the end of the day NFP is really helping us to keep God as part of the conversation and discernment about our family plans. </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Thank you Jesus for all 'dem baby stickers. </div>
<br />
<div style="font-size: 130%; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="qt2"></a><b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt2" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 2 ---</a></b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b>Double Beds Are NOT for Married Couples... </b><br />
<b>and other life lessons.</b><br />
<b><br /></b></div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Seriously though. Learning to sleep next to another person is hard enough, but when both tend to sprawl out (OK maybe it's just me..), ain't nobody getting sleep in a double bed. Thankfully, we were able to upgrade to a Queen at the end of November. But more than sleeping arrangements, I'm realizing that marriage is a great way to grow in humility and charity...even if I'm reluctant to do so. </div>
<br />
<div style="font-size: 130%; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="qt3"></a><b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt3" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 3 ---</a></b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b>Sometimes we won't like each other. </b><br />
<b>And that's OK.</b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><br /></b></div>
I love this clip from Pope Francis' General Audience. "Sometimes plates fly! Seriously!... But there's no need to call in the United Nations..." :) Plates don't fly in our casa (maybe a few pillows...) but there are definitely moments where, like any normal couple, we just don't like each other very much. But that's OK as long as we continue to get real comfortable with the words "I'm sorry," and "I was wrong," and of course, "I love you." <br />
<br />
<div id="fb-root">
</div>
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<br />
<div class="fb-post" data-href="https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10151965223070723" data-width="466">
<div class="fb-xfbml-parse-ignore">
<div style="text-align: center;">
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/R9VwSF6N02w" width="560"></iframe></div>
</div>
</div>
<br />
Nerf guns are also helpful. <br />
<br />
<div style="font-size: 130%; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="qt4"></a><b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt4" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 4 ---</a></b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b>Laughter is a must.</b></div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaI5pAjGKQE95cQzazL3fK9_TGuFSl8AcSF5VyCkPCPuQiIrb09pzc_1Kq5uhb2qMfi-nP7pIeafmpZYUAdBRWCvA7MBZXVIWfE-7PhxW_NbZLld5_GDMU5i8YFPcXwcZ-nxSwkDFZD4Q/s640/blogger-image--1686291612.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjaI5pAjGKQE95cQzazL3fK9_TGuFSl8AcSF5VyCkPCPuQiIrb09pzc_1Kq5uhb2qMfi-nP7pIeafmpZYUAdBRWCvA7MBZXVIWfE-7PhxW_NbZLld5_GDMU5i8YFPcXwcZ-nxSwkDFZD4Q/s400/blogger-image--1686291612.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">My Valentine's Day gift from Michael: <br />
A homemade cake in honor of St. Valentine's martyrdom.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Marriage is hilarious. Sometimes we just have to laugh at ourselves (or each other... lovingly). Laughter is a must in married life. I'm very grateful we have this in our home. </div>
<br />
<div style="font-size: 130%; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="qt5"></a><b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt5" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 5 ---</a></b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b>It really does take Three to Get Married</b></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8ZxoU22aMKJSbArvagILIUe2bIMmi5127HshU_q_Qek6xguYH5qHp2rVPimPOX8oUzLj35FQlvX7zR01Z8z1eDBy6PCBMbPXdiki1oz2fUFN2RNMAHYHx8ZQDJiSi65a9VeJEfIqBi2s/s1600/blogger-image-801554999.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8ZxoU22aMKJSbArvagILIUe2bIMmi5127HshU_q_Qek6xguYH5qHp2rVPimPOX8oUzLj35FQlvX7zR01Z8z1eDBy6PCBMbPXdiki1oz2fUFN2RNMAHYHx8ZQDJiSi65a9VeJEfIqBi2s/s1600/blogger-image-801554999.jpg" height="320" width="300" /></a></div>
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
It doesn't matter how many JPII quotes we know. It doesn't matter how many books we've read, or even how great we are at NFP. If Christ is not at the center of our family then there's no point. Lord knows we aren't perfect, and we could certainly be better at prayer... but we're getting there. God has given us a great gift in this Sacrament, and as a priest told me during confession, "<i>Your husband's soul has been entrusted to you, and yours to his.</i>" <b>Whoa</b>. No joke. Our main job is to help one another become saints, and we're going to need God's help (and the intercession of all the Saints!) to help us do this :). </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
<br /></div>
<div style="font-size: 130%; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="qt6"></a><b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt6" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 6 ---</a></b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b>Complementarity is a Beautiful Thing</b></div>
<br />
<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; color: black; font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 21px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: normal; orphans: auto; text-align: center; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: auto; word-spacing: 0px;">
</div>
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnsXPvY9d70OAXbmvGi1iIxZ3h8eUUio_dCmROzX1AhF8KqjgYlR2NG-LUIIOwMxPiFWXaRBFSIjSHi4XQV_ZU1oTnWHzoO_A_f2Lu-zjvw_AKrSW9W65QMtyzeDIDvKk1Q7MBnFuGF3o/s1600/johnstons+bw+after+papal+audience.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnsXPvY9d70OAXbmvGi1iIxZ3h8eUUio_dCmROzX1AhF8KqjgYlR2NG-LUIIOwMxPiFWXaRBFSIjSHi4XQV_ZU1oTnWHzoO_A_f2Lu-zjvw_AKrSW9W65QMtyzeDIDvKk1Q7MBnFuGF3o/s1600/johnstons+bw+after+papal+audience.JPG" height="320" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="font-size: 13px;">Honeymooning in Rome: Oct 2013</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
And I'm not just talking about the male/female dynamic. We balance each other out and we learn from one another. I have a tendency to worry, Michael knows how to stay cool and reassure me that everything will work out. Michael's extremely talented in the "Fix-It" department, and I'm... really good at cheering him on :). I don't want to sound like I don't have anything to contribute to the relationship; I'm just more and more aware of the fact that there are plenty of situations where, if it were just me, I would have hit level 10 crisis mode, but Michael has been there to help us work through it <i>together</i>. We're a team. I look forward to seeing how this teamwork plays out when we become parents :)</div>
<br />
<div style="font-size: 130%; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="qt7"></a><b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt7" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 7 ---</a></b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<b>This is only the beginning.</b></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/ooiLP_zqnFs" width="560"></iframe></div>
<br />
<div style="text-align: justify;">
My sister-in-law made us a DVD with pictures from the last 4 years of our relationship with this song in the background. The song is beautiful, and seeing our journey summed up in 4 minutes was definitely something to warm the heart. The best part of the last six months? It's only the beginning. God led us to one another, and His hand continues to move in our lives in a really beautiful way. We might not understand the timing of everything at the time, but God continues to prove His faithfulness in our lives. If God can do all that He has in the past 4 years... I can't imagine what excellent adventures are ahead for us!</div>
<br />
And of course, we continue to ask for your prayers :) 6 months down, many many decades to go!<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
For more Quick Takes, visit <a href="http://www.conversiondiary.com/">Conversion Diary!</a></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-56972238237899098622014-04-09T09:12:00.002-05:002014-04-09T10:30:31.006-05:0011 Things About d* <span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">p a x </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">I recently discovered Kendra over at <b><a href="http://www.catholicallyear.com/" target="_blank">Catholic All Year</a>. </b></span></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">I just love finding other Catholic women out there who are loving and living their vocations as wives, mothers, single ladies, discerning, etc... It makes me appreciate the Body of Christ that much more. Thank you for your witness ladies (and gentlemen!). </span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">Kendra had a lovely little link-up I thought I'd try out... we'll call it much needed break from thesis writing/a way to keep blogging without thinking too hard :) </span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #351c75; font-family: inherit; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"><b>1. Where do you live? And why do you live there?</b></span></h2>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">Dodge City, Kansas. Don't know where that is? Basically the middle of no where in the southwest corner of the state. </span>It's really not that bad... but who knew Dodge City was a REAL PLACE and not just the location of Gunsmoke? <br />
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<i>Why </i>am I here? <b> Short answer:</b> Because God has a sense of humor.<br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Longer Answer</b>: Because after I finished my second year of mission/volunteer work I saw an ad for a youth ministry position at a parish in a far off land called Kansas. I got a call 2 weeks later from the Pastor telling me that the YM position was filled, but he wanted to create a position for me, which happened to be my <i>dream job</i>. Almost 4 years later and I'm still here. :)</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #20124d; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"><b>2. What are you currently watching and/or reading?</b></span></span></h2>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">I'm working on my thesis so I'm currently balancing several books with short breaks of Netflix and YouTube. My favorite books from my research are:</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"><b><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicNIVFJrpJpAP_hQ7iT58pk6Bg7FL2m23R43lAk9LpomvGs2Ma5yLPmvtxptA5SKXggGq7Ax2FFdLVAvIYDTnYqFTRo3aPhhqDALqdLAsskkSY5DSoKefCyedvOyA3Z86w7p6lMC_zOMQ/s640/blogger-image--1837939282.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEicNIVFJrpJpAP_hQ7iT58pk6Bg7FL2m23R43lAk9LpomvGs2Ma5yLPmvtxptA5SKXggGq7Ax2FFdLVAvIYDTnYqFTRo3aPhhqDALqdLAsskkSY5DSoKefCyedvOyA3Z86w7p6lMC_zOMQ/s320/blogger-image--1837939282.jpg" width="241" /></a></b></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">by <a href="http://piadesolenni.com/" target="_blank">Dr. Pia de Solenni </a></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"><b>And </b></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"><b><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgox_fxEDLdF9vjt1_ZFGOPz4biRyyEzK5ab0ChwSHx38E_GnV6edBtHC6JC_uJZDmvjIZJw3ay8hsDvbEEdqQIkPwgfrbusxLX93At4uIPuhdYDESyXRS53UpNIbtljV9PK-4urDjTO-FL/s640/blogger-image--2030064304.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgox_fxEDLdF9vjt1_ZFGOPz4biRyyEzK5ab0ChwSHx38E_GnV6edBtHC6JC_uJZDmvjIZJw3ay8hsDvbEEdqQIkPwgfrbusxLX93At4uIPuhdYDESyXRS53UpNIbtljV9PK-4urDjTO-FL/s320/blogger-image--2030064304.jpg" width="240" /></a></b></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"><i><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Sexuality-Authority-Catholic-Church-Migliorino/dp/1589661281" target="_blank">Sexuality & Authority in the Catholic Church</a></i></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">by Dr. Monica Miller</span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">On Netflix, I'm watching Arrested Development. How is it 2014 and I am JUST NOW learning about this show?! The episodes are just short enough that I don't feel bad when I take a break from reading and need something mindless and humorous. </span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">Life after the thesis....and I'm almost ashamed to say it... I intend on having a weekend marathon of Game of Thrones Seasons 2-3. It's bad.. but it's so good....</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #351c75; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"><b>3. What kind of Catholic are you: cradle, or convert? (Or considering?)</b></span></span></h2>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">I am a cradle Catholic, but my parents didn't actually start attending Mass until we moved to Memphis when I was in the first grade. My mom converted to Catholicism a short while later, and then my Dad was ordained to the permanent diaconate in the year 2000. Since the early 1990s my family has been actively involved in Church life, and that's a big part of why I work for a parish today. The older I get the more I appreciate my parents and their faith journeys and that they have given us the courage to be Catholic! </span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgttZJaz_2pqAH-c_mIMeNH1H9pBbzUMYOSXTRhCs32OWjiJ8rQYMShU89BpQ4ey7NDS7VbEcu6O1RRD4mohn6QDR3dzcemOEV8sK15XVtELHlUfPeCXrbfeNaXA8k_JKMbAXUGscVzvK5u/s640/blogger-image--1634290477.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgttZJaz_2pqAH-c_mIMeNH1H9pBbzUMYOSXTRhCs32OWjiJ8rQYMShU89BpQ4ey7NDS7VbEcu6O1RRD4mohn6QDR3dzcemOEV8sK15XVtELHlUfPeCXrbfeNaXA8k_JKMbAXUGscVzvK5u/s320/blogger-image--1634290477.jpg" width="320" /></a></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #351c75; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">4. Can you point to one moment or experience that made you a practicing Catholic? (Or want to be?)</span></span></h2>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">In January 2001 my high school led the March for Life in D.C. The night before the march after the vigil Mass we went back to the gym at Catholic University of America, and before going to bed on the gym floor they announced that confession and adoration would be available. For some reason I felt compelled to go, and this was a HUGE game changer for me. I already had a love for my faith, but that night at adoration something happened. The Eucharist was <i>really Jesus</i> (I mean it always has been and always will be but this was the first time I GOT that) and somehow, on the floor of a racquetball court, </span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"><b>Jesus became real to me in a very intimate and personal way</b>. That was the moment something "clicked" and I've never been the same!</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #351c75; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">5. How many pairs of shoes do you own?</span></span></h2>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">That I actually wear or that are sitting in a box waiting to be thrown/given away? Next question please?</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #351c75; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">6. Are you a good dancer?</span></span></h2>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3GWC7nwYb3GDbPRzGjaRkp1m2ZTljIPAj6AXuRo_DgSKp4SvasQvjNoiK5FBaPoBVUbgs1lFRxilSlbUrSucHx5YgH7WfZYZSN30rEK3b_iRu5MEyt7cr-DHQrPxmwiQLiR2j48UyC2w/s1600/blogger-image-407683973.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3GWC7nwYb3GDbPRzGjaRkp1m2ZTljIPAj6AXuRo_DgSKp4SvasQvjNoiK5FBaPoBVUbgs1lFRxilSlbUrSucHx5YgH7WfZYZSN30rEK3b_iRu5MEyt7cr-DHQrPxmwiQLiR2j48UyC2w/s1600/blogger-image-407683973.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></span></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit; font-size: small;">Wedding reception = The Best Time of my LIFE!</span></td></tr>
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: inherit; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">Y'all the Cupid shuffle is my jam. I <b>love </b>dancing. Am I good at it? Doesn't matter. But I love to dance. Zumba and wedding receptions (sometimes at the same time) are my FAVORITE. In fact, do <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y6Sxv-sUYtM" target="_blank">yourself a favor and go have a dance party to this song right now.</a> </span><br />
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<span style="color: #333333; font-family: inherit; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">Go ahead. I'll wait. </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #351c75; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">7. Who usually drives, you or your husband?</span></span></h2>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">Depends. If I promise my husband <a href="http://www.promisedlanddairy.com/products.html#section_7" target="_blank">Promised Land chocolate milk</a> or back scratches, he drives. </span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #351c75; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">8. What's your favorite holiday and how do you celebrate it?</span></span></h2>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">Christmas is hands down my favorite holiday. The music. The decorations. The atmosphere... It's just the most wonderful time of the year! Being newlyweds, this is one of those holidays we're still trying to figure out. This past Christmas was our first one together, and it was also the first time we'd ever spent Christmas away from our families. It was still special, but ideally I'd like to spend Christmas with family, food, and movie marathons in our pajamas with the fireplace going. </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"><br /></span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgu5SlIJsKxbO5lOY-P2qeGuS-vTB2OZK1AUMqCvYQTZUCnCv2nts0IdpA3nzfNl2CVaPH0tpmDqV9zk5nlrNrEGMbECazoLDnKk1FZAOt74I0I1Zq0_unNRv92Sy9PaovGqrg63w4BkfXB/s1600/blogger-image--1957810168.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgu5SlIJsKxbO5lOY-P2qeGuS-vTB2OZK1AUMqCvYQTZUCnCv2nts0IdpA3nzfNl2CVaPH0tpmDqV9zk5nlrNrEGMbECazoLDnKk1FZAOt74I0I1Zq0_unNRv92Sy9PaovGqrg63w4BkfXB/s1600/blogger-image--1957810168.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #351c75; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">9. Which is correct? Left or right?</span></span></h2>
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<a href="http://wac.450f.edgecastcdn.net/80450F/mix97-3.com/files/2013/01/Toilet-Paper-Over-Under.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-decoration: none;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><img border="0" src="http://wac.450f.edgecastcdn.net/80450F/mix97-3.com/files/2013/01/Toilet-Paper-Over-Under.jpg" height="213" style="border: 0px solid rgb(206, 206, 206); padding: 4px;" width="320" /></span></a></div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">What sort of question is this... LEFT of course. There is no other way. </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"><br /></span></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"><br /></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #351c75; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">10. Do you have any scars?</span></h2>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">July 31, 2003* I tore my ACL and meniscus cartilage in my left knee during a tournament at the beginning of volleyball season. It was my Senior year, and it was a rude awakening to the fact that I wouldn't get to play volleyball in college as I had planned. But something amazing happened. God's plans turned out to be so.much.better. than any of my plans for college or playing for the USA Women's team. I can look at my scar and honestly thank God for it. Without this scar I wouldn't have studied Spanish and I probably wouldn't have gone to Costa Rica. I wouldn't have ended up in Mexico doing mission work for a year, which means I wouldn't have gone to Texas the following year, which means I wouldn't have met my husband, which means I wouldn't be married and living in southwest Kansas. Or at least that's how I see it :)</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"><br /></span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">*This is St. Ignatius of Loyola's feast day, who also incurred a knee injury that changed his life.</span></span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #351c75; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;">11. What's the most famous thing you've ever done?</span></span></h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipdVvM8R9ZyNvCC-QA8Fb8uA2WgQETE1nA7mGNc8zMBS2KqgH1l2rlAn__xk5A-hCpuLGCMWYmglAGYhRxjCgfNnN_BEXu05-mtACIAQhEkvkCCpG_O3n3jPD2QEU17WaHQOgf3dewtPc/s1600/2013-10-16-Pope-Shake+Pope+hand.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEipdVvM8R9ZyNvCC-QA8Fb8uA2WgQETE1nA7mGNc8zMBS2KqgH1l2rlAn__xk5A-hCpuLGCMWYmglAGYhRxjCgfNnN_BEXu05-mtACIAQhEkvkCCpG_O3n3jPD2QEU17WaHQOgf3dewtPc/s1600/2013-10-16-Pope-Shake+Pope+hand.jpg" height="211" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="color: #333333;"><span style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"><a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2013/11/a-few-moments-with-francis.html" target="_blank">Best wedding present we received. Hands down.</a></span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #333333;">Well that was a fun break! </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #333333;">Head over to Kendra's page for other excitement... and maybe even join in on the <a href="http://www.catholicallyear.com/2014/04/answer-me-this.html" target="_blank">Answer Me This Link Up</a> on Sunday! </span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333;"></span><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuHf8BcDcR7sI_7F1iP5KZn5hdRPPbXrEuUJNn2QOgY6qnSwmabpFbw0A18g_g7JwZhVclfkYKj-FmDdXdow_FDxgA2ptwQOI-VrQ0LN_rTk_nlJo4n1vyejzhrEmY7sjNpNR9fcymGg8/s1600/Answer+Me+This+Logo.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjuHf8BcDcR7sI_7F1iP5KZn5hdRPPbXrEuUJNn2QOgY6qnSwmabpFbw0A18g_g7JwZhVclfkYKj-FmDdXdow_FDxgA2ptwQOI-VrQ0LN_rTk_nlJo4n1vyejzhrEmY7sjNpNR9fcymGg8/s1600/Answer+Me+This+Logo.png" height="200" width="200" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: #333333;">be at peace</span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333;">walk on water</span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333;">be not afraid</span></div>
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<span style="color: #333333;">d*</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-size: 13px; line-height: 20.799999237060547px;"><br /></span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-1326866211789668742014-03-28T13:25:00.001-05:002014-03-28T13:28:07.488-05:007 Quick Takes #8: Lenten Knots & Novenas<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://www.conversiondiary.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/7_quick_takes_sm1.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><img alt="" class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-1387" src="http://www.conversiondiary.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/7_quick_takes_sm1.jpg" height="214" title="7_quick_takes_sm" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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It's almost the fourth Sunday of Lent you say? Oh Lent where hath thou gone? </div>
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Here are #7QT on what the first half of Lent has brought with it thus far....</div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"> </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="qt1"></a><b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt1" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 1 ---</a></b></span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><b><span style="font-size: small;">#ashtag </span></b></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2LTHtVnuopGJVNtzL02jifIHjgOxhQAEL8fTjbkKoqTl0PY0oLvf5ZL2mKt4zK4rHuPGkJdedwk29XxJb_F9TKfKDnfhaNUpel5P6svXB96DyPXtFIe_6D99CEj_vJIsySXVNxuEtDa0/s1600/blogger-image--169582350.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2LTHtVnuopGJVNtzL02jifIHjgOxhQAEL8fTjbkKoqTl0PY0oLvf5ZL2mKt4zK4rHuPGkJdedwk29XxJb_F9TKfKDnfhaNUpel5P6svXB96DyPXtFIe_6D99CEj_vJIsySXVNxuEtDa0/s320/blogger-image--169582350.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="-webkit-text-size-adjust: auto; background-color: rgba(255, 255, 255, 0);"><span style="font-size: small;">Like good Catholics we properly kicked off Lent without the #ashtag. Props
to my friend Omar for getting this awesome selfie of some of
our young adult family after the Ash Wednesday Mass. You can clearly tell that we were stoked for this forty day journey (some of us more excited than others...).</span></span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt2" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 2 ---</a></b></span></div>
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<b>Forty Days of Thesis Writing</b><br />
<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3H4ynU2LvVdhUgAm4YaJxdS28Q-RdokjZe9hyphenhyphenh9lrvQpqvYt5ix0gyl9tGhTP7OC6hkUytyLnPHfeIFGQB4WYKmCOXi54pHwyL8ySYBU9Whotz_UZ1ynnci7ZGmQyFECowUY0BoyUM7M/s640/blogger-image--1685282877.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3H4ynU2LvVdhUgAm4YaJxdS28Q-RdokjZe9hyphenhyphenh9lrvQpqvYt5ix0gyl9tGhTP7OC6hkUytyLnPHfeIFGQB4WYKmCOXi54pHwyL8ySYBU9Whotz_UZ1ynnci7ZGmQyFECowUY0BoyUM7M/s320/blogger-image--1685282877.jpg" style="cursor: move;" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Johnston Home Office: Where Newlyweds Write Theses</td></tr>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">My hairdresser asked me "What do you and your husband do for fun?" To which I was only able to resond, "Netflix and thesis writing." <b>This has been our Lent</b>. Books, writing, trying not to feel defeated, and taking breaks with Arrested Development. </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">The blessing in all of this is that not only are my husband and I in the same graduate program, but our thesis topics are kinda-sorta-not really related. I'm focusing on <b>New Feminism and Developing a Theology of Women</b>, and my husband is writing about <b>The Masculinity of God</b>
(or why we call God "He"). Blessed John Paul II, <a href="http://piadesolenni.com/" target="_blank">Dr. Pia de Solenni</a>, <a href="http://www.catholic.com/profiles/monica-miller" target="_blank">Dr. Monica Miller</a>, and others have been <i>huge </i>helps in these projects. My love for JPII and the Theology of the Body just keeps growing... and since our final project is due around the same time as his canonization, I figure we've got someone praying extra hard for us in heaven :). </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">And we'd really appreciate all of your prayers as well! </span><br />
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">(No really, assault the heavens for us. We need it!)</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="qt3"></a><b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt3" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 3 ---</a></b></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: inherit;">Did you know she takes care of knots too?</span></b></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-AVk7UGxVHyGIxdocNhfHBh7WJZt6PX2CZ0_3Zo2FPC3gtHfmYZu_syQyGb7LidnVJqnMOdNdsbcEyMxv0wIC0iOsTfixy1jv-sfGqMQmfnnels7DL6i7ERhvr-rXZBv5nonKD_ofJCQ/s1600/Mary_Undoer_of_Knots.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-AVk7UGxVHyGIxdocNhfHBh7WJZt6PX2CZ0_3Zo2FPC3gtHfmYZu_syQyGb7LidnVJqnMOdNdsbcEyMxv0wIC0iOsTfixy1jv-sfGqMQmfnnels7DL6i7ERhvr-rXZBv5nonKD_ofJCQ/s1600/Mary_Undoer_of_Knots.png" height="320" width="182" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Mary, Undoer of Knots, pray for us!</td></tr>
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How have I been Catholic all my life and I am <i>just now</i> hearing about this novena? This is amazing! If you've never heard of the Our Lady Undoer of Knots Novena, <a href="http://www.maryundoerofknots.com/novena.htm" target="_blank">check it out</a>. My husband and I are finishing up this novena this weekend, and our big intention has been our thesis projects. That knot is pretty huge right now, but it's nice to know Our Lady is helping us work through it!</div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="qt4"></a><b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt4" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 4 ---</a></b></span><br />
<b><span style="font-size: small;">30 days with St. Joseph</span></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsU3o41yoZ9Q9O-eXHH7tW4gST-dkpP690r5NY7RV0XSArEMMkdAJvab5S5MHZExk7rT8x3NSH2Uy2hIhjyzwjCkciyRa81-QomS85beNweqpfuJRzsULqe5ADwdpiZXK3aLI99QID2J8/s640/blogger-image--1415908686.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="299" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsU3o41yoZ9Q9O-eXHH7tW4gST-dkpP690r5NY7RV0XSArEMMkdAJvab5S5MHZExk7rT8x3NSH2Uy2hIhjyzwjCkciyRa81-QomS85beNweqpfuJRzsULqe5ADwdpiZXK3aLI99QID2J8/s320/blogger-image--1415908686.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: small;">Speaking of novenas, did you know there's a <a href="http://www.ewtn.com/devotionals/prayers/thirtydayjoseph.htm" target="_blank">30 day St. Joseph Novena</a>? Neither did I until this past February. That's another new prayer that is going on my list of favorites. I won't lie ... that's a <i>long novena prayer</i>... there were nights we weren't sure we'd make it through the whole thing... but we did it! And we prayed for all sorts of things... our theses, the discernment of our family, family and friends, etc... St. Joseph is a pretty neat guy... Happy to add him to the list of patron saints for our family!</span> </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="qt5"></a><b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt5" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 5 ---</a></b></span></div>
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<b>It's already been a year!</b></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Proposal: Easter Vigil 2013</td></tr>
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March 30, 2013 just a few minutes before midnight <a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2013/04/still-thinking-bout-easter-vigil.html" target="_blank">my husband asked me to marry him</a>. A year later, I see how God's hand has moved beautifully in our lives, and how God's timing is so much better than my own. We've been married almost 6 months and we've learned that marriage is beautiful, humbling, and requires the Cross to be at the center. Something tells me the next year will be full of even more surprises and hugs from God! :)</div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="qt6"></a><b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt6" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 6 ---</a></b></span></div>
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<b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">Let the Light In</span></b></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">My parish promoted the Sacrament of Reconciliation this Lent<b> </b>with the phrase "Let the Light In". Here's the video our Director of Youth Ministry made for us, encouraging people to go to make confession part of their Lenten journey. </span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">What do you think? :)</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"> </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.blogger.com/null" name="qt7"></a><b><a href="https://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=98312726483304619#qt7" style="color: black; text-decoration: none;">--- 7 ---</a></b></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIOzXy4hA6z4_ihSw8-RdI8I7sEd1hrylud-c9faj645yDqSGymUlmKVNUIiFXqRaovuX-UuCAJFH60fsbGW-F0ELMYrKvT198Uq8hD3KiKub-V2kC0Xrn_DAiLGAVv7xe3wCa449Rr7M/s1600/Square.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIOzXy4hA6z4_ihSw8-RdI8I7sEd1hrylud-c9faj645yDqSGymUlmKVNUIiFXqRaovuX-UuCAJFH60fsbGW-F0ELMYrKvT198Uq8hD3KiKub-V2kC0Xrn_DAiLGAVv7xe3wCa449Rr7M/s1600/Square.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><b>I'm going to the 2014 TOB Congress!!! </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><b> </b>I don't even know how I can begin to put into words how excited I am about this trip! This is going to be one of the highlights of my summer, and a much needed booster shot after graduation. <a href="http://tobcongress.com/speakers/#sthash.qzllZ7wm.dpbs" target="_blank">The speaker list is impressive</a>... we'll be hanging out with folks like Dr. Janet Smith, Christopher West, Damon Owens, and many others who have had a big impact on my formation. Theology of the Body has played a key role in my ongoing conversion and it's a pretty big part of the work that I do in the parish. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;">To be honest, TOB saved my life... but that's another story :)</span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: inherit;">For more Quick Takes, visit <a href="http://www.conversiondiary.com/">Conversion Diary!</a></span></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13514083507129385101noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-98312726483304619.post-17906454138948941512014-03-05T14:22:00.003-06:002014-03-05T14:22:54.097-06:00Let the Light In!<div style="text-align: left;">
p a x</div>
<br />
At the end of February my husband and I moved into our new home.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifh2t96erqqNXqWsCBSaSvqKkOfgbd-OqeNoyRxRrMxYnT9KDvf9sL-4miQdYYn02YFtSUG7ZrGkO_fIlkCN0wtFYHsRpD3JYc0Jmnt-Mgfgu-dEtHcmCMdpaMVv1a0A4PfYfWbNG2zVU/s1600/new+home.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifh2t96erqqNXqWsCBSaSvqKkOfgbd-OqeNoyRxRrMxYnT9KDvf9sL-4miQdYYn02YFtSUG7ZrGkO_fIlkCN0wtFYHsRpD3JYc0Jmnt-Mgfgu-dEtHcmCMdpaMVv1a0A4PfYfWbNG2zVU/s1600/new+home.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">We went from a dark apartment covered in 1970s shag carpet (complete with carpet in the bathroom and kitchen) to a duplex with a finished basement, and extra bathroom, and a kitchen with wood floors. We're still renting, but this definitely feels like home sweet home! </span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;"><br /></span>
<span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: white;">My favorite room in this apartment is the family room because it has so much natural light... 11 windows and a large glass door to the backyard. From the moment we walk through the front door it feels like light just <i>bursts </i>inside. </span>There's even a skylight in the kitchen. Light is everywhere and it makes the place feel a lot more like <i>home.</i><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEig9hsiN4a8UZ1qcXaRvt2oIVL5FJu1knfPgPRpjDTGek8Vssu3cojJEcZ_pnJLq0wXFNVtyAydRgZOjG3Ex3RJ4kwLUf3nFlv7TFnpee4z4AE1Clqoo8Pspnp4mtMuchiwB-Zff7RKcRo/s640/blogger-image--2109894159.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEig9hsiN4a8UZ1qcXaRvt2oIVL5FJu1knfPgPRpjDTGek8Vssu3cojJEcZ_pnJLq0wXFNVtyAydRgZOjG3Ex3RJ4kwLUf3nFlv7TFnpee4z4AE1Clqoo8Pspnp4mtMuchiwB-Zff7RKcRo/s200/blogger-image--2109894159.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Old Apartment</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTQk3DdLwnUej0QGG2lvD8BEJzDzP6IRmf0yPhiKkiWvVqhxlNB5ZE4CkRGd8ms_zg-9TMpKaXIoJ7TUuCHy9ldJIeR520AGeBXPAPKVdk1qFM1TB4RhLaXBeDb0mKkOSf9aK5zENYE30/s640/blogger-image--836015935.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTQk3DdLwnUej0QGG2lvD8BEJzDzP6IRmf0yPhiKkiWvVqhxlNB5ZE4CkRGd8ms_zg-9TMpKaXIoJ7TUuCHy9ldJIeR520AGeBXPAPKVdk1qFM1TB4RhLaXBeDb0mKkOSf9aK5zENYE30/s200/blogger-image--836015935.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The New Home</td></tr>
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<b></b>I didn't realize how <b>dark</b> our old apartment was until we moved. And now that we have a space with lots of natural light, I can't imagine living in dark "Old Shaggy" ever again. </div>
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There are lots of benefits of letting natural light in. Not only will it keep our energy bills down (hopefully!) but it also <i>feels better</i>. Light is warm. It is comforting. It can put us in a better mood and can even help us appreciate our surroundings. Light feels like home.</div>
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In the midst of completing our move and preparing for the start of Lent, Isaiah 9:1-2 came to mind:<br />
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<i>The people who walked in darkness have seen a great light;</i></div>
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<i>Upon those who dwelt in the land of gloom a light has shone. </i></div>
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<i>You have brought them abundant joy and great rejoicing...</i></div>
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I don't know if I'd call "Old Shaggy" the land of gloom... but there's dramatic difference from where we were to where we are <i>now</i>. Being in an environment filled with light makes us realize just how dark our last home was, and it makes us more grateful for what we have. </div>
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I think the same thing happens to us spiritually. Sin loves darkness. Sometimes we don't realize just how dark the darkness within us is until we've allowed the Light of Christ to break through. In my own life I can recall moments where darkness had been the <i>norm. </i>And then at some point, maybe when I least expected it, Christ's love and mercy broke through and the Light that entered into my life brought joy and rejoicing. With God's grace I was able to recognize the darkness that had once existed for what it really was. <span style="background-color: yellow;"></span></div>
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Of course, I am human so I continue to make mistakes and fail... but that's where the beauty of the Sacraments, especially Confession and the Eucharist remind me to renew that joy of being in the Light of Christ. </div>
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My friend and coworker, David McHugh (<a href="http://noellegarciamusic.blogspot.com/" target="_blank">Noelle Garcia's</a> husband) made this video for our parish to help us reflect on how Confession helps us to Let the Light In: <br />
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As we step into the Lenten season and think about what we're "giving up" or "doing extra" over the next six weeks, maybe the first thing we need to do is ask <b><i>how does Christ want to Let the Light into my soul</i>?</b> What's keeping me from allowing that Light into my life? And once I've allowed Christ's light to pierce the darkness, what happens next? How will that light make a difference in my <i>personal encounter with the Lord</i>?<br />
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I've said before that <a href="http://lifeoutoftheboat.blogspot.com/2013_03_01_archive.html" target="_blank">Lent is not my favorite</a> and yet I realize that this is the time of year where the Holy Spirit really does a number on my heart if I'm open to it. It's a time of recognizing my weaknesses, but also allowing Christ to transform those things into strengths. I feel like this year in particular Christ is asking me to <i>let the Light in</i>, so He can make me who I am called to be.<i> </i>If I can open up my heart even just a tiny bit more, I think I can come to realize just how much I need Christ in my life and how much <i>I want Him to be there. </i><br />
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When the Light of Christ bursts into our hearts, we realize that it is beautiful. It is welcoming and it is merciful. It is where our hearts are at home. <br />
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<i>Lord, this Lent please let the Light into my soul... </i></div>
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<i>Pierce the darkness, and lead me to you. Amen. </i></div>
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be at peace<br />
walk on water<br />
be not afraid<br />
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Jesus I Trust in You! </div>
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